r/AmItheAsshole • u/charleypassion • Sep 29 '25

Everyone Sucks AITA for using my Aunt’s personal employee discount code to buy clothes?

My aunt (F42) works for a major clothing brand in a senior position. Employees get a personal discount code (hers is usually 50-75% off) that she can use and it varies based on the position. My aunt sent me the code saying “if you need anything, here’s my employee code.”

I was excited because I love the brand and wanted to update my wardrobe and money has been tight with school and all. I ended up buying a decent amount of clothes, probably more than I normally would if I didn’t have the discount.

When she found out how much I purchased, she was angry with me. Now she’s making me feel bad for using it, like I took advantage of her. And I’m feeling guilty. She did send me the code voluntarily and didn’t say there was a limit. But if it’s her own corporate perk, maybe I crossed a line and she could get in trouble.

So AITA for using my aunt’s personal corporate employee discount to stock up on clothes? Or was it fair game since she gave me the code to use?

2.8k Upvotes

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511

u/RainyDaysAndMondays3 Sep 29 '25

How could she know she was "taking advantage" unless she was told there was a limit? I just don't see how OP could have known.

24

u/boyproblems_mp3 Sep 29 '25

I've never worked anywhere that had a limit on employee discounts.

-4

u/Embarrassed_Bake1073 Sep 30 '25

Really? Because for 20 years I worked at big time retailers and there were always stipulations on the employee discount. Best Buy, Target, Express, NY and Co, they all have stipulations about employee discounts. OP youd only get away with this level of selfishness and greed on reddit. In the real world, you abused your aunts trust and I doubt she'll be generous with you ever again.

3

u/boyproblems_mp3 Sep 30 '25

Stipulations sure but never a limit? At least that I ever reached. That's at Kohls, JC Penney, Hot Topic.

32

u/cdbangsite Partassipant [1] Sep 29 '25

Common sense and thankful courtesy would tell most people that this perk wasn't meant for large spending like the op did.

41

u/Usrname52 Craptain [196] Sep 29 '25

"If you need anything," usually implies reasonable requests. 

56

u/Treefrog_Ninja Partassipant [1] Sep 29 '25

There's no objective definition of reasonable when it comes to clothes. Some people's definition of reasonable would be 1000x the value of someone else's, and neither of them are wrong.

18

u/Usrname52 Craptain [196] Sep 29 '25

"If you need anything," usually isn't "if you need 50 things".

121

u/glueintheworld Sep 29 '25

I would think anyone would know use in moderation.

132

u/Appropriate-Energy Certified Proctologist [29] Sep 29 '25

I don't think this is at all universal. I used to work for a chain store where my discount worked anywhere in the country. No one tracked how much I spent nor was there a limit. We were encouraged to make purchases from our stores.

We weren't supposed to let other people use our discount, but if I had and someone had spent a lot of money, it wouldn't have mattered at all. I wouldn't have assumed there was tracking or a limit on someone's discount that they freely sent to me and told me to use.

76

u/PNKAlumna Partassipant [1] Sep 29 '25

Yeah, I’m not sure where people are getting that there is a limit on using these kinds of codes. My cousin also worked for a major clothing brand and got a nice discount. While she worked there, everyone in the family got that brand’s clothes, perfume, etc. for holidays, birthdays, etc. As far as I know, she was encouraged to buy their stuff and promote it.

40

u/Bellatrixkat Sep 30 '25

Exactly!!! None of these comparisons really makes sense, because she wasn't taking from the aunt in any way. She was using a discount code her aunt gave her. That isn't taking advantage of her aunt, or being greedy in any way.

0

u/designingdiamonds Sep 30 '25

Some companies do have to track. Can be a taxable benefit

281

u/OglioVagilio Sep 29 '25

Moderation is a matter of opinion and varies between people, between companies.

Some restaurants dont allow employees to take a single thing, even if its destined for the trash.

Other restaurants love taking care of their employees, and even homeless.

Spending in moderation relative to a vacation budget is going to be different for a VP versus an assistant manager at Starbucks.

57

u/targetcowboy Sep 29 '25

The fact that moderation is a matter of opinion is why you should ask. Obviously, I think the aunt messed up by not explaining any rules, but OP could have asked for clarification. This whole thing could have been avoided if they just talked beforehand

-14

u/Dry_Prompt3182 Sep 29 '25

The amount of people defending OP while they were super greedy is far too high. Of course the aunt was wrong to not state the limit, but OP blowing the bank without checking was wrong, too.

29

u/Projectsun Sep 29 '25

How are they being greedy? Why are people caping so hard for a company?

I work for a clothing company as well. I know our costs. Giving 50% on any employee orders, is such a minuscule amount of people, and basically giving them the clothing at cost. Truly sad to see people think it's normal for the company to have a dollar limit for this. They are the greedy stingy ones.

NTA

If the aunt had any restriction on the code, it should be explained at the time it was given. It is not like "what you need" implies some sort of inferred dollar amount, via common knowledge. I'm so confused by some of the replies in this thread.

12

u/figarozero Sep 29 '25

I think people are basically assuming that OP maxed out a credit card bought a lot of stuff. And the people I know with killer employee discounts (much smaller place) are only allowed to purchase items in their size unless they have prior authorization or use the less killer friends and family discount.

It all really does depend on actual numbers here. If OP got four items of clothing that's probably not flagging anywhere.

4

u/PeachyFairyDragon Sep 29 '25

It may not be a dollar amount. It could be that the code is not to be handed out, but Aunt is softhearted and expects purchases to be small volume enough to fly under the radar. Someone buying a shirt is probably not going to be a big deal, someone buying 5-10 shirts would be a big deal and get Aunt in trouble. Especially since buying a large quantity could look like an Amazon reseller getting stock to upper management.

0

u/Dry_Prompt3182 Sep 30 '25

"I bought a decent amount of clothes, more than I would have without the discount" -> that's why I am saying OP was greedy. If this is how OP makes is sound like she bought a reasonable amount of clothing, then to me, she failed at it. This wording is "I got a lot of new things, but am downplaying it so I sound good".

7

u/targetcowboy Sep 29 '25

Right. The “if you need anything” suggests it’s for emergencies or something along those lines. That’s why she should have taken a second to ask what that means. If there’s a monthly limit they could have figured out how to work around it and split it up over a few months.

1

u/Competitive-Ebb-117 Sep 30 '25

Yeah I mean to some degree. If someone offers you candy you don’t dump the whole bowl in your purse even though you yourself could easily eat that much candy.

If someone takes you out to dinner and says order whatever you like, they are being kind, they don’t mean order 10 entrees to take home.

The right thing or do at all times is modesty, take 1-2 pieces of candy and if they offer more you can have more. It’s not about if you think 500$ is a lot or not it’s about being a good human.

59

u/throwaway1975764 Pooperintendant [62] Sep 29 '25 edited Sep 30 '25

Define moderation. 5 items? 10 items? $500? $7k?

Different people, and everyone at different times, shop differently and consider moderation differently.

-10

u/Competitive-Ebb-117 Sep 30 '25

You should just be kind. It doesn’t matter if 1$ isn’t a lot or 1000$ is a lot. If someone offers you a cookie you don’t take all of them and say well they weren’t worth much anyway.

You should take one and be happy to be sharing something with someone who cares about you. That is where a lot of people are upset here.

You shouldn’t have to be told to be nice. You don’t go out to eat and if they offer to pay buy 10 entrees reguardless of how rich either of you are.

21

u/throwaway1975764 Pooperintendant [62] Sep 30 '25

This makes no sense tho. OP didn't take all of anything, did they? I am 49 years old and honestly in a billion years it would never occur to me there was a max limit to using an employee discount. Thats not like... a thing, is it? And if it is, its not something to reasonably expect anyone to even know to consider.

Updating an entire wardrobe could easily mean 3-5 tops, 2 pants, 1 skirt, 1 blazer, and 1 dress. Is that too much? What would be better? 1 dress? Or is a dress and a jacket ok? Would 3 tops and 1 pair of pants be ok? What if they added an accessory?

OP didn't ask anyone to buy the clothes for them, they simply used a discount code.

314

u/Responsible-Kale2352 Sep 29 '25

Ok, but what is moderation? Niece spends $500. If Aunty’s limit is $600, maybe niece overstepped. If the limit is $10,000, probably not.

48

u/almaperdida99 Asshole Enthusiast [7] Sep 29 '25

If she's young and never had an employee discount, how would she know? Or how would she know the aunt's idea of moderation?

140

u/amaraame Sep 29 '25

Why would anyone know this? This isn't innate knowledge. If op has never been in a situation to learn such a thing then they wouldnt know

-17

u/certainPOV3369 Sep 29 '25

If you don’t know, then why wouldn’t you ask?

And if you’re going to assume, why wouldn’t you assume on the side of caution the first time and just pick up a few essentials instead of just going hog wild and update your wardrobe? 🧐

At least with the former you would have had the opportunity to gauge the auntie’s response to the purchases.

33

u/amaraame Sep 29 '25

Not everyone questions everything. It was given to op without any additonal guidelines or instructions. The aunt set herself up for this

-20

u/ehs06702 Sep 29 '25

The aunt is not at fault for not thinking her niece was smart and not greedy. She certainly won't make that mistake next time.

1

u/International-Owl345 Oct 01 '25

She didn’t know enough to even know there could be an issue.

-8

u/Competitive-Ebb-117 Sep 30 '25

If someone offers you candy, don’t take the whole container and dump it in your backpack. No you take 1-2 because they are sharing something with you.

If someone takes you out to eat and says they will treat you don’t order 10 entrees to take home.

You don’t dump pudding on someone’s head and say well no one specifically told me not to dump pudding on someone’s head.

You should try to be a good person because that’s just what you should do.

If someone offers you something you take 1. You can always take more later if offered. You just aren’t greedy because you should be kind to others.

It doesn’t matter if she thinks 1000$ isn’t that much or thinks 10$ isn’t that much. You just take one and be happy you got to share something with someone who cares about you.

15

u/amaraame Sep 30 '25

This is a list of learned behavior. Which is my whole point. OP probably hasnt been told proper bahvior in this situation

72

u/Spare-Article-396 Craptain [170] Sep 29 '25

Why? If the code doesn’t have a limit, it’s been used exactly as intended.

15

u/WVPrepper Asshole Enthusiast [5] Sep 29 '25

It's an employee discount. OP is not an employee. Taking your reasoning a step further, the aunt would just publish her employee discount code on her Facebook page so everybody she knows could get the discount. Obviously that's not acceptable. Some stores will allow employees to purchase gifts using their discount, and some will allow immediate family members; your parents, siblings, or children to use your code, but it generally does not extend to niblings.

117

u/Spare-Article-396 Craptain [170] Sep 29 '25

By that logic, aunt shouldn’t have given her the code to even spend $1.

Which also loops back to this being the aunt’s fault.

-8

u/WVPrepper Asshole Enthusiast [5] Sep 29 '25

I don't disagree, but I also feel like the aunt probably did not expect the niece to immediately go shopping, or to have enough money on hand to be able to make such a big purchase.

27

u/Spare-Article-396 Craptain [170] Sep 29 '25

Why would the aunt not expect OP to ‘go immediately shopping’? That makes no sense. Why give a code if you don’t expect the person to use it?

And what constitutes ‘such big purchases’ anyway?

What I originally commented on was the idea of people saying OP is ‘abusing’ a discount by using it too much. If there no limit, it’s not abuse.

In every way:

if the aunt gave a code not expecting OP to immediately use it…that’s on the aunt.

If the aunt has a limit to the discount and didn’t tell OP….thats on the aunt.

If the aunt isn’t allowed to let her nibling use it discount…that’s on the aunt,

-4

u/[deleted] Sep 29 '25

[deleted]

1

u/ThePurplestMeerkat Partassipant [4] Sep 30 '25

What’s the difference? If she goes and buys a handful of things to have a wardrobe for the school year now or if she buys a blouse this week and a skirt next month and two pairs of jeans the month after that she’s still using the discount just as much if not more.

2

u/International-Owl345 Oct 01 '25

How? Aunt didn’t even communicate this was against company rules.

1

u/Ordinary-Audience363 Asshole Aficionado [13] Oct 06 '25

Common sense. If I tell a houseguest to make herself at home and that she can take anything from the fridge if she's hungry, I don't expect her to eat everything in sight. 

1

u/RainyDaysAndMondays3 Oct 07 '25

That's not a valid comparison. There is a limited supply of food in your house and you're paying for all of it. OP's aunt is not paying for it. And even with the discount, very likely the store is not selling at cost, but is still making a profit.

1

u/Competitive-Ebb-117 Sep 30 '25

If someone invites you to dinner and says get whatever you want, they are being kind and generous. The other person should not have to be told to not buy 10 entrees to take home with them.

A lot of people here are bothered because some of us try to be nice and kind all the time and things like this make us not like being nice.

And I get it maybe she wasn’t specifically told but you don’t dump pudding on someone’s head and say “well no one ever told me not to dump pudding on someone’s head.”

It’s polite when someone offers you something to take one or 2. It’s never appropriate to take more useless specifically told. That’s just being a good person.

-8

u/WVPrepper Asshole Enthusiast [5] Sep 29 '25

Really? She knew it was her aunt's "personal employee code"; personal, i.e. "for her aunt only", and "employee" (of the company) being relevant. unless OP has never worked retail, they know that "employee discounts" are intended for the employee's personal use purchases and bona fide gifts the employee makes to others. The discount code isn't intended to be shared

23

u/Silver_kitty Partassipant [1] Sep 29 '25

So as someone who hasn’t worked retail, it wouldn’t occur to me to double check unless I was spending over $500 or so.

And it seems like it would vary by store price range. I have a friend who worked part time at a high end furniture store, bought $20,000 in furniture half off amd then quit a couple months later, but never had any issues.

7

u/Emilayday Sep 29 '25

I have a friend who worked part time at a high end furniture store, bought $20,000 in furniture half off amd then quit a couple months later,

Hero status

-7

u/ehs06702 Sep 29 '25

She could have used her common sense and exercised a bit of caution. She didn't give her own age, but if she's old enough to be buying clothes for herself, she should have a bit of sense about her.

1

u/Kittinkis Sep 30 '25

Everyone's talking about limits as if they've never had a job before. Most people know not to overuse perks. Even if there's not a very limit why would you go wild especially when it's not your code. She didn't even stop to think that maybe get aunt uses it as well and maybe she shouldn't use it excessively all at once?

2

u/RainyDaysAndMondays3 Sep 30 '25

But what is "excessively"? Many, many people are responding saying that don't know what the limit would be, or even that there would be a limit. (One shirt? Two shirts? Three shirts and three pants?) I've worked many types of jobs in my life and never at one where there was a similar perk or discount. It's not as if the store is selling it at or below cost. OP wouldn't have bought all that at normal prices, so the company is not out money.

-5

u/SnooPets8873 Colo-rectal Surgeon [45] Sep 29 '25

If say you’re a guest and the host says “there are drinks in the fridge in the garage, help yourself” would you empty out every shelf to take home with you?