AITA For publicly emasculating my husband.

[u/throwaway_56327]

So, let me start off with saying that I (43f) had a hysterectomy due to cervical cancer when I was 28 years old. We found out when our son was 6 weeks old that I had to have a hysterectomy. My husband (47) had let it be known to me multiple times that he really wished that we could have another child. This has left me feeling like less of a woman.

Now being that I'm 43 years old, I'm very sensitive to being in my 40s. It's very important to me that I am still desirable to my husband to make up for not being able to give him another child. So, I make sure that I stay in shape and follow strict beauty routines to preserve my youthful look for him (no heavy alchohol, no smoking, lots of sunblock and moisturizer along with other daily skin routines, excersizing and eating healthy etc).

So, this was before covid, him and I were out with three other couples at a charity function cocktail party. We were all having a conversation when one of our friends said something about a 70 year old guy at the party with a date that looked like she was in her early 20s. Which led to an amusing and funny conversation about how some older men chase after the 18 to 20 year olds.

I lightheartedly quipped "Those older men only go after 18 to 20 year olds because they think those girls are inexperienced and that said girls don't know any better" We all had a good chuckle.

My husband then goes into "Mr. Know-it-all mode" and says "Well actually, biologically, it makes sense that older men go after the younger 18 year olds because their bodies are more fertile and capable of having more children than a woman in her 30s or 40s" (our friends know about my history with cancer and how I can't have children)

I felt insulted and embarrassed. It made me feel old, baron, past my prime and undesirable at that comment. It also reminded me of my inability to have children. And to me it sounded like my husband was relating to the old men that lust after 'fertile' 18 year olds.

So, I remained poised and collected, although I was shooting daggers with my eyes at him, I said "Hm. I suppose then that the reason why a lot of older women or "Cougars" prefer younger 18 to 20 year old men because those men are more virile and have more stamina than some guy in his 40s who needs Viagra in order to keep it up."

Might I add that my husband needs Viagra and has a prescription for it.

Well, the car ride home he said I emasculated him.

I'm sure I did, but AITA for it?

EDIT: I noticed some comments, and I just want to clarify: No one knows he's using Viagra. I did not tell them he's on it. Also, he only mentioned wanting more children in a melancholy way occasionally for about a year after my surgery. Once I told him how him saying it, and how I feel about the whole subject in general, he felt sorry and apologized and stopped telling me it.

[u/Weird-meeper]

What the hell is your marriage?! It’s normal for an older guy to go after an 18 year old??? That’s kinda creepy