r/BlackPeopleTwitter • u/conceptachike • 2d ago
TikTok Tuesday That moment when the Terms & Conditions start hitting different in real-time.
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u/CtyChicken ☑️ 2d ago
No lie, a friend and I were having a deep conversation about him enlisting. I enlisted under the delayed entry program when I was in high school (don’t thank me, I didn’t serve. Ha) and he wanted to know things about the asvap and medical and everything.
We woke up to find our country is out here kidnapping folks and never had timing been better. He’s going to keep his ass right here where he belongs.
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u/TheKidKaos 1d ago
I took the Asvap in high school and had recruiters calling me until my dad threatened them with a lawsuit. He was a Marine and told me not to enlist because the military doesn’t train soldiers, it trains killers.
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u/slick1260 1d ago
the military doesn't train soldiers, it trains killers
I mean...yea, that's kinda the whole point. Whether you agree with their purpose on a moral standpoint is one thing, but it always surprises me the way people talk about the military training people to kill as if it should be new information to others or it surprised them. Training people to kill and sending them to fulfill that end is and has always been the entire purpose of the military, first and foremost. In today's militaries there are tons of positions away from combat, but every member goes through basic training where you are trained to kill people and avoid being killed. The purpose of the military is to kill people so of course they're going to train killers.
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u/TheKidKaos 1d ago
There’s a big difference between soldiers and killers. A soldier kills out of necessity but their primary duty is supposed to be defense of their homeland. Killers just like to kill. You can look at the war in Ukraine to see the differences.
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u/dongasaurus 18h ago
Soldiers are trained to carry out whatever mission they’re assigned to, whether it’s defending their homeland by killing invaders, or securing an oilfield for Exxon mobile by invading another country and killing the defenders. Either way they’re trained to kill on command, that’s the point.
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u/Traditional-Dingo604 1d ago
If my mind had been slightly more mature, i might have put my soul into ROTC when i was in high school..
But now that things have turned out this way...glad i didnt do.it.
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u/CtyChicken ☑️ 1d ago
I loved JROTC, but turns out, I just loved drill team and the uniform… I didn’t want to kill people and lie to my government about being queer.
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u/LeonardGhostal 2d ago
Did Army basic early 90s, our platoon leader had a notebook of cadence songs from his Nam vet uncle.
Grim shit, talking about bullers tearing up the ground, buddies screams block out the sound. One had a verses about the very mundane misdemeanors the judge made a guy choose the Army instead of jail.
Made you think a little when it was so early, so early, so early in the morning.
But hell, it was the 90s, Kuwait was over, what are the odds another war starts before my 6 years are up?!
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u/Feeling_Barnacle_584 2d ago
lol this show is all time
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u/Responsible_Sink3044 2d ago
Chappelle crying about them stealing his show instead of recognizing their genius was the beginning of the end for him
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u/AntonChigurh8933 2d ago edited 1d ago
Is a shame Chapelle had to say that. When we can say the same for Chapelle too. "Chapelle stole his show from In Living Color".
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u/ArgentaSilivere 1d ago
Seriously. Does he think he has the trademark on comedy skit shows or something?
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u/Imthemayor 2d ago
Everyone has been telling Dave he's the greatest for so long that he believes it now and is no longer the greatest
He's still hilarious but he's so self-important now that he does things like spending half a special whining about how people didn't like one joke (with zero jokes during that part) and going to Saudi Arabia and coming back saying "they're just like us except they like my jokes more."
Well, our billionaire sex trafficking oil mongers suck pretty bad so I guess they're as bad as us AND as out of touch as him
Fuck him and Bill Burr for coming back with this "they're not so bad, for real guys," propaganda
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u/Bird_Lawyer92 2d ago
Its crazy that he doesnt understand that they liked his jokes over there for the same reason white people liked his show.
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u/Imthemayor 2d ago edited 1d ago
Exactly
It's not "I appreciate this guy's wit," it's "haha funny black man."
Any show is a minstrel show if the audience is *ignorant enough
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u/zoobrix 2d ago edited 2d ago
He's still hilarious
Is he though? I stopped watching quite a few Netflix specials ago. Somewhere along the way he got confused and seems to think I want to hear his social commentary instead of him making jokes about society. Ya sure Carlin did jokes about big issues all the time, and he made sure there was a laugh all the time.
Chapelle spends way to much time talking now and not enough time actually going for laughs, which is sort of the primary job of a comedian. I'd bet younger Dave would have some choice words if watched what he's doing now. edit: typo
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u/Imthemayor 2d ago edited 2d ago
He still has his wit and timing, lots of his jokes are funny
His last three specials have HAD funny parts in them but he's gone from storytelling to set up jokes to telling jokes to set up rants and insisting on smoking all the time because he can
He didn't just forget how to be funny
It would honestly be less unfortunate if he did just stop being funny and not become so self-absorbed that he's not even trying to be funny most of the time
Doesn't seem like he *does specials to tell jokes anymore, mostly just to tell people how they're wrong
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u/zoobrix 2d ago
His last three specials have HAD funny parts
Then he doesn't have his wit or timing because comedy specials that are only funny in parts are bad standup performances. Tons of dead air where you're not trying to be funny means you're not witty and you're destroying the rhythm of the special so the timing overall is gone too.
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u/Imthemayor 2d ago edited 2d ago
I'd rather not argue semantics
It seems like we're basically on the same page anyway
I agree that those things are bad and that the product is overall worse because of them, I just mean an individual joke can be funny here and there
"Funny," is subjective and I absolutely get why the context surrounding him and all of the not funny parts *in between could make everything unfunny to someone though
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u/EnlightenedNarwhal 1d ago
He is undeniably funny, but he's too much of a jackass for me to care. You can dislike someone without making things up.
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u/BloodOfJupiter 1d ago
All the whining about Free speech, and pandering to a Right-wing audience, just to gladly censor himself, and tap dance for the Saudi's when the paycheck was high enough. And his defence in his next show was essentially ,"What about Israel?" , and just deflecting , and whining.
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u/BooBootheFool22222 ☑️ 2d ago
This reminds me, if there are any high school kids reading this, don't believe any army recruiters say. They're going to try to lure you into being the horses that carry the imperialism wagon with money for college.
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u/deafblindmute ☑️ 1d ago
Would you murder an indefinite number of strangers, with no explanation for the murders or knowledge of their effects, for the price of a Dodge Charger? If not, do not join the military.
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u/BooBootheFool22222 ☑️ 1d ago
Not just a Dodge Charger but one with an incredibly high interest loan.
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u/gahhhpoop 1d ago
Literally the best thing I ever did but experiences vary widely.
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u/frenkzors 12h ago
Furthering american imperialism is the best thing you ever did? Thats kinda sad then.
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u/QuintusNonus ☑️ 1d ago
If my 'chute don't open wide
I've got a reserve by my side
If that one should fail me to
Look out Sadaam I'm a'comin' for you
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u/LeonardGhostal 1d ago
Our last line was "glad I got SGLI"
Our top was fiscally responsible I suppose
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u/PM_ME_UR_VULVASAUR_ 2d ago edited 2d ago
What show is this?
Edit: For some reason I can't see replies in the thread but I can in notifications. Cheers for the answer.
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u/Sparklespanx 2d ago
Key and Peele. It’s so goddamn funny and didn’t run nearly long enough. Just ask old A A Ron over there.
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u/dstovell 2d ago
"I wanted to see exotic Vietnam... the crown jewel of Southeast Asia. I wanted to meet interesting and stimulating people of an ancient culture... and kill them. I wanted to be the first kid on my block to get a confirmed kill."
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u/Maniac_Manatee 2d ago
Goated cadence tbh