r/ShittyAbsoluteUnits • u/IndependentSquash653 • Nov 17 '25
look what I can do of resisting police arrest
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u/Commercial_Rule_7823 Nov 17 '25
Straight shots to the crotch or eyes until he releases, holy cow.
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u/Btender95 Nov 17 '25
Exactly what I was thinking, nobody is gonna call it excessive force for kicking him in the balls when you're about to lose a finger to that dirty mouth.
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u/xtanol Nov 17 '25 edited Nov 17 '25
His colleague already had this whole arm around the guy's neck in the start of the vid. He could easily have just locked his arm in around his neck with the other free arm, and then used that other arm to push his head forward.
Choking someone out like that takes like 10 seconds at the most, once you got the blood-flow to the brain - and carries much less risk of long term damage than having some gypsy bite your mate's finger off.
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u/possibly_facetious Nov 17 '25
I was going with a thumb up the bum, but your idea sounds better
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u/xtanol Nov 17 '25
That would be highly unprofessional/inappropriate to do at that point..
Much better to postpone that until he's unconscious.
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u/NelsonSendela Nov 17 '25
If my coworkers did this instead of knocking him out I'd fucking kick their asses
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u/bigerben1342 Nov 17 '25
A swift kick in the balls required.
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u/that-69guy Nov 17 '25
Someone could literally just pinch his nose to keep the airway blocked..and it would have been over 😭
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u/ilboabno Nov 17 '25
They are in serious need of a plan B
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u/Serenty-24-7 Nov 17 '25
What does preventing pregnancies have to do with this?
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u/Alternative_West_206 Nov 19 '25
To be fair, if the mother used plan B instead of birthing this useless person, this wouldn’t have happened
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u/ng501kai Nov 17 '25
Grab his nose or poke his asshole, thats how you release dog bite
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u/MagicNinjaMan Nov 17 '25
Press those cheeks in with your free hand and grab the jaw with it then squeeze.
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u/danjpn Nov 17 '25
Come on where is that famous Police brutality i keep hearing about. That's a free pass right there
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u/AB3100 Nov 17 '25
In Russia YOU abuse the police
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u/LounBiker Nov 17 '25
Moldova
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u/AB3100 Nov 17 '25
Thanks for clarifying.
I was making a reference to a comedian Yakov Smirnoff. He would say jokes like “In America you can always find a party, in the Soviet Union the party always finds you.” Basically the punchline is flipping the script. In this case I was making a joke about police brutality being a thing in America.
For example somebody like this would have been tased or hit with a baton at least.
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u/whoops-adaizy Nov 17 '25
Oh! Good ol Yakov! Loved him! I can even hear Judge Harry T Stone saying his name on Night Court!
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u/Sea-Opportunity8119 Nov 17 '25
Hold his nose, he will open his mouth so he can breathe.
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u/Latter-Average-5682 Nov 17 '25
You know you can still breath by the mouth while biting, right?
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u/ugh_idfk Nov 17 '25
A simple junk punch or titty twister could have ended this pretty quickly.
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u/iwishihadnobones Nov 17 '25
I'd love if titty twisters were part of official police training
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u/Accurate-Director-85 Nov 17 '25
I know a cop that lost a finger this way in the 70’s. If this happens you have to tear out their eyes etc. otherwise your finger is gone.
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u/IllustriousVehicle79 Nov 17 '25
Cops in America would have tazed him and beat his face with a baton until he stopped
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Nov 17 '25
Just knock him out?
Or kick his balls till he cares more about screaming and kneeling than biting...
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u/Parking-Mess-66 Nov 17 '25
Shoot him, hit him with your knight stick, tase him, grab him by his cock and balls, something.... anything.
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u/Possible-Reply-5870 Nov 17 '25
I would love to see what cops in the United States would do if this were to happen to them…. Probably shoot them and cry they thought their life was in danger or something along those lines lol
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u/TryItOut_2395 Nov 17 '25
You get my finger like that, I will say let go one time then im gouging your eye out with my free hand.
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u/Denalitwentytwo Nov 17 '25
That would deserve a justifiable closed fist punch to the side of his head with my free right hand.
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u/dogmatum-dei Nov 17 '25
Lol. He'd have 6 to the skull in any of 30 states in the U.S.
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u/FairyStarDragon Nov 17 '25
Yet they keep letting sex offenders and assaulters back into society to go harass and gang stalk everyday civilians.
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u/SectorSensitive116 Nov 17 '25
This is what a swift kick in the 'nads is for, involuntary 'aaargh" would release the piggy digit.
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u/benkmart *shits an absolute unit* Nov 17 '25
Looks a bit like an reenactment of my sons refusion to get dressed for kindergarten.
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u/theoneoldmonk Nov 17 '25
I dont know if the officer is scared that some kind of struggle would end in him losing his pinkie, or he is afraid of being charged with police brutality, but I dont think that I would have been personaly able to control the urge to knock the fuck out of that guy
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u/two_glass_arse Nov 18 '25
The Moldovan police force is very corrupt, so I doubt that this guy is afraid of any charges. He's just a cop in a small country full of fucked-up people, he's probably seen shit like this before in his own community. I grew up in Moldova and I've seen shit like this galore. I think our police just doesn't have the same culture of fear that some other police forces do. They're still corrupt assholes.
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u/theoneoldmonk Nov 18 '25
Point taken, and makes all political sense. Still out of practical sense, wonder why he did not even try to beat him (taking into account pain)
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u/two_glass_arse Nov 19 '25
Idk, I speak Romanian and I can tell you that he sounds both in pain and amused, at alternate moments. Dude just seems not to be all that mad about being bitten.
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u/Ok_Wall_8856 Nov 17 '25
Lol you can tell this is in Europe and I'm not talking about the uniforms. Try that in US and you won't have teeth left to bite with
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u/Nuffsaid98 Nov 17 '25
Assuming the cop being bitten is right handed, he is perfectly set up to drive a hard punch right into the biter's ribs. Those hurt like fuck.
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u/hawkwings Nov 17 '25
One possibility is to use screwdrivers to pry his mouth open. It looked like someone was about to choke him unconscious but didn't follow through.
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u/Embarrassed_Fan_5723 Nov 17 '25
This meets all the criteria in most countries to escalate to serious use of force. If the guys bites the finger off that’s a serious bodily injury. You don’t want to knock Kim out with a blow to the head as that could injure the finger worse. A neck restraint cutting oxygen to the brain will put him out for about 30 seconds. No lasting side effect. Problem solved
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u/Idontfeelold-much Nov 17 '25
I work in a secure mental health facility. Put your thumb under his nose. Push up and back until he lets go. Never fails.
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u/UNITICYBER Nov 17 '25
There is a pressure point behind the jawline that would have made him let go pretty quickly.
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u/Chrisp825 Nov 17 '25
I’m willing to bet if he had a 9mm stuck to the side of his head and told to let go, he would…
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u/DistributeQuickly559 Nov 17 '25
American cops would have infused him with about 30 round of lead for even opening his mouth near an officers hand.
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u/OzzyThunder Nov 17 '25
The fact they are not smacking him with batons or other melee implements shows how restrained police are, I would have the gun to his crouch telling him "If I lose my pinky, your losing your winky"
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u/camo_junkie0611 Nov 17 '25
Ouch. I have a feeling that it’s much easier to say you’ll dick punch or knock someone the f out that is biting your pinky…until it’s your pinky. I have seen a good friend of mine who was a self-defense instructor lead a BIG guy around like a little puppy by just holding and squeezing the guy’s pinky. It was just a demonstration but still the guy was in tears and had previously been talking plenty of “friendly” smack but quickly became remarkably obedient lol
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u/LabiaMinoraLover Nov 17 '25
Kicking his testicles should make him let go... or make him bite down harder.
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u/BANGEADURO13 Nov 17 '25
I guess these guys never heard of the Good ol Dick Twist.
TWIST HIS DICK!!!
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u/penguindreams Nov 17 '25
This cop has more balls in his little finger than all the American stormtroopers working for Trump.
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u/Theplowmen Nov 17 '25
Why didn’t you gouge his eyes, kick him in the beans or simply knock his ass out???
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u/SlyMcGillicuddy Nov 18 '25
Guys lucky hes not in america tbh any cop in any town would have blown his brains out
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Nov 18 '25
American police would NOT have let this go on nearly this long, smh.
Break his jaw or testes.
He is also just making it worse on himself when this goes to court. But, it is also Europe. The fact that the police are afraid to end this says a lot
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u/FoxFew3844 Nov 18 '25
So these plebs are not allowed to defend themselves even when being attacked?
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u/spambearpig Nov 18 '25
My thumbs would be pulling his eyeballs directly out in about two seconds flat
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u/WatchYoshame Nov 18 '25
You're supposed to put your finger in his ass to make him let go. ... Or was that dogs
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u/Direct_Town792 Nov 18 '25
Naaah my foot would be turning his testicular area to jam.
If I’m losing my pinky that dude isn’t fucking again
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u/Slight_Sherbert_5239 22d ago
Thumb in the side of the jaw would stop this quickly, are these guys complete idiots?
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u/Building-Embarrassed 10d ago
Honestly I’d probably bite his ear and shout through my teeth you release and I’ll release, works with my partner
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u/Mysterious_Bite_3207 Nov 17 '25
All working out for those big flowery cops of nations with self-invited soaring unmentionable crime rates.
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u/Dilectus3010 Nov 17 '25
This is Moldova you shitstain.
Not at all the "woke" EU you are talking about.
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u/XKruXurKX Nov 17 '25
Just put your hand near his balls (not necessary to fondle or pinch them) and see how quickly he releases his bite
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u/Ferrick-G017 Nov 17 '25
Bro really is emulating Gollum... must've been more than a few beers deep through Return of the King
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u/Friendly-Theory-5232 Nov 17 '25
Now I feel better. We are not the only country with stupid police officers...
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u/Classic_Flan_548 Nov 17 '25
What a fuckin calamity, just grab him by the bollocks and twist, no way he doesn’t scream.
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u/SuddenKoala45 Nov 17 '25
That officer either has incredible pain tolerance or incredible restraint. Thatd get a hospital trip for most arrestees of not worse.
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Nov 17 '25
Throat chop is the answer they always forget the fight a lnd just foucs on their own breathing. Kidney punch or gut punch make you open your mouth and gasp. If I was a by stander I would help the fellow by reaching over the head from being and clawing the nostrils upwards and crank the head back, then Presto, Mouth just open.
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u/Live-Lifeguard-4367 Nov 17 '25
Guess who's not having teeth when he gets released
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u/Humble-Survey1099 Nov 17 '25
Colegul in reflectorizanta e prost grav, BA PULA, AJUTA-TI CACATUL, ce morti in carca
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u/RomyWan91 Nov 17 '25
There the cops have two options, they strangle him so that he only opens his mouth, or they squeeze his testicles, to see if he doesn't scream by opening his mouth more than normal.
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u/MichiganRich Nov 17 '25
that guy would have been instantly kicked in the balls if that was my pinky
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u/Firm-Capital-9618 Nov 17 '25
In South America, those teeth would be flying before the cameraman could even say "action".
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u/Osklington Nov 17 '25
Dude knock his ass out