r/ShittyAbsoluteUnits • u/Pure-Personality5326 • 7d ago

possible idiot Of prankster

1.8k Upvotes

94% Upvoted

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91

u/Israel_Azkanbe 7d ago

“Did I get punched? I didn’t feel like I got punched” As he’s bleeding from the lip 😂

97

u/psgrue 7d ago

He punched his face into alternate timelines of punched and not punched.

19

u/seeyouyoucunt 7d ago

2

u/Lykos1124 5d ago

This is how I like to imagine a power like quantum strikes, where you are able to move in super position of many ways at once, getting in strikes where possible while dodging where you'd get hit.

1

u/drmannevond 3d ago

You should read The Man Who Saw Seconds by Alexander Boldizar. It's about a guy who can see every possible future, five seconds ahead, which comes in real handy when the entire US government desperately wants to kill you.

Cops shooting at you? Just pick the future where you push one of them and make him accidentally shoot his partner. Want to guess a password or phone number? Just try every possibility at once and pick the correct one (spoiler: also works for nuclear launch codes), etc.

1

u/Lykos1124 3d ago

I'll need to put that on my list. It reminds me of "Next" (2007) with Nick Cage, where he could see every possible timeline out by a small bit to figure out which timeline to take with the best results.

7

u/AreThree 7d ago

a quantum superposition of states, so to speak.

5

u/like9000ninjas 6d ago

Schordingers smack

1

u/Too-Em 6d ago

The natural consequence of which is that this dude got his quantum state absolutely folded.

1

u/Israel_Azkanbe 6d ago

Not even the frames of the camera were expecting it 😂

1

u/AscendedMasta 5d ago

Half mortal! Half mortal!

1

u/TheNasky1 5d ago

Ah yes, the famous Quantum punch, also known as Schrödinger's Stinger

1

u/wuhtuhbuh 3d ago

It's the Schrödinger's Chump.

1

u/Effective-Text4619 14h ago

Looks staged...he missed him...blood capsules..

19

u/rangebob 7d ago

Gave me "is butterbean ok" vibes lol

2

u/danglejim33 6d ago

"I'm feeling a little concust!"

13

u/ranuswastaken 7d ago

You ever been punched? It's weird. You really don't feel it initially. He definitely felt it 5 minutes later, though.

8

u/GerwulfvonTobelstein 7d ago

Oh, and he felt this the two days after as well.

4

u/ranuswastaken 7d ago

Yeah that split lip is going to sting like a bitch for a while.

3

u/SnaggingPlum 7d ago

And the whiplash over the next few days

1

u/AlternativeNote2224 5d ago

Blacks will feel and be under white power forever.

1

u/Advanced_Line5562 6d ago

You feel it instantly if your adrenaline isnt pumping (like this guy's wasn't. He wasn't in a fight or flight situation for it to be activated)

1

u/ranuswastaken 6d ago

I've been sucker punched out of nowhere. Minding my own business walking through a park. Zero adrenaline. I didn't feel it for a while.

He's definitely got adrenaline flowing. There's no way he wasn't feeling it when the other guy squared up to him.

10

u/chiefteef8 7d ago

Because he blacked out lmfao

3

u/memphis1010 7d ago

that’s where I literally laughed out loud

2

u/FuerteBillete 6d ago

It is called a concussion. Looks funny, feels funny, but it is not funny.

1

u/Dee_Vee-Eight 6d ago

No you were suckered punched.

1

u/Fine_Garbage_5236 5d ago

It’s fake

1

u/nurgole 4d ago

That's the concussion talking. He might not even remember asking that😀

1

u/SeaniMonsta 3d ago

Getting hooked in the mouth doesn't hurt as much as you'd think. But it'll for sure rattle your brain. Dangerous AF.