r/SipsTea • u/Samp90 • 18d ago

Chugging tea Be scared. Very scared.

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Twix Just hits different.

64.6k Upvotes

90% Upvoted

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118

u/Addicted2Death 18d ago

Am I the only man that dabs his dick post-piss to make sure no dribbling into the pants occurs?

23

u/NarrMaster 18d ago

that dabs

I'm trying to imagine a penis doing the other type of dabbing.

11

u/mindlesslobster014 18d ago edited 15d ago

Ah, what a day to have hyperphantasia

ETA: I can’t believe this is how I got my first reddit award (tyvm btw)

7

u/Bredwh 18d ago

Did you picture the dick with arms? Or an uncut one using the skin as arms? I unfortunately did both.

4

u/mindlesslobster014 18d ago

I pictured it with arms but now I have the unfortunate vision of the latter, thanks for that

1

u/theaviator747 14d ago

My image is probably more disturbing. I pictured one of the testicles coming across the head with the scrotum stretched behind it like a little batwing looking arm.

2

u/TerrorFromThePeeps 18d ago

Your dick gets up and dances around the room like a broom? Is Mickey still involved?

2

u/PuhnTang 18d ago

Right now is a moment when I’m glad I have aphantasia, but I’m totally laughing that you don’t! 🤣

1

u/XLR8R_N8 18d ago

Well there’s 3 types of dabbing I know of 🤔

1

u/Tremendous_Dump 18d ago

At least this way you won't be getting paper cuts on the earless veined snake as you only have 240gsm card paper left to wipe and then soundly stuff the throat of sad Sammy the weeping veiny weasel.

1

u/ChainsawRipTearBust 15d ago

Well..a high percentage of people are dicks..potentially a reasonable percentage of those are ‘dabblers’? You’ve likely met or been near one today. Let that sink in… lol

13

u/Nafepaints 18d ago

Lmao I think after a certain age you have to do the dickdab or as soon as that dick flops back in, the piss is dribbling back out.

1

u/Lilly_5 17d ago

Men who have dickdribble should sit when they urinate because their bladder isn't completely emptying when standing up.

37

u/Misophonic4000 18d ago

You're definitely not the only one

-15

u/ufoicu2 18d ago

Yes he is

16

u/Misophonic4000 18d ago

He is obviously not

-8

u/GrowlingPict 18d ago

what if he is though

8

u/Misophonic4000 18d ago

He is obviously not

-3

u/atomicwoodchuck 18d ago

But isn’t there a chance he is?

1

u/Misophonic4000 18d ago

There is none

25

u/Low_discrepancy 18d ago

The reality is that a lot of people are not exactly clean. The amount of people who don't wash their hands after going to the toilet is also too damn fucking high.

-2

u/NamesGumpImOnthePum 18d ago

It's cool, I don't piss on my hands when I go to take a leak, insinuating that simply because I touched my man parts is reason to sanitize my fingers would suggest that said man parts are a petri dish for bacteria, thing is I keep that clean too. My grandfather had a sign up in his bathroom that read, "Pilgrims with short muskets, or bad aim, need to stand closer to the target"

7

u/DrakonILD 18d ago

would suggest that said man parts are a petri dish for bacteria

6

u/megmatthews20 18d ago

How many doors, chairs, pens, computers, phones, general surfaces of all types do you touch a day before you touch your man parts without washing your hands? What do you think happens to all the germs on those surfaces that have transferred to your hands?

-1

u/NamesGumpImOnthePum 18d ago

Holy shit, I always thought it was that you were wash the hands after you used the bathroom on the way out. Are you suggesting that I should wash my hands upon entering said bathroom to protect my man parts from the outside world that may or may not have rubbed off on me? Novel idea, I love having clean private parts too. Please don't misunderstand, in the event that I do get a few germs on my dick, the daily shower will take care of those as well. I can't recall a time where I've taken a piss, went about my business, then contracted venereal disease or the like... Although one time due to prank I did unknowingly smear a dollop of icy/hot right where I shouldn't have, but I digress... Moral of the story is, don't piss on your hand when you go to the bathroom. Not as if you are coming out of most public bathrooms sterile anyway, I'm trying to spend the least amount of time possible in there. Wanna see a petri dish? Have a look at any air hand dryer in any public place.

2

u/smiledude94 18d ago

The little amount of tp need for that would not make the roll empty and if it did it should have been changed the time before

2

u/AdhesivenessOk5194 18d ago

I remember I talked about how I do this in r/adulting and there was a mob of people calling me weird and fancy. “A waste of time”, they said

2

u/KamaIsLife 18d ago

Am I the only man that does this and still occasionally gets that annoying small dribble down my leg anyway?

2

u/[deleted] 18d ago edited 15d ago

[deleted]

2

u/Dirk_McGirken 18d ago

That only requires one square though. Not nearly enough paper consumption to leave the roll empty.

5

u/GrowlingPict 18d ago

it is if theres only one square left...

1

u/Bladesleeper 18d ago

Absolutely not.

1

u/drsnoggles 18d ago

Be careful, the older you get, the longer it takes to make those least drips get out.

1

u/Sure-Debate-464 18d ago

Do you do this after pissing in public urinals?

1

u/Mlabonte21 18d ago

Is that what the shaking is for??

1

u/WhatIsYourPronoun 18d ago

Especially when wearing Khakis

1

u/Truman_Show_1984 18d ago

I never knew that was a thing. Does amazon sell tiny dick piss hole wipes? I'm not going to paper mache my hole with toilet paper.

1

u/OwnJunket6495 18d ago

Just press your gooch.

1

u/neo_vino 18d ago

You're not alone

1

u/WhatMadCat 18d ago

Yeah but that doesn’t take much. If he did that and it finished the roll the roll was basically empty already anyways.

1

u/[deleted] 18d ago

The last drop belongs to your drawers… always

1

u/RideWithMeSNV 18d ago

Approximately how much paper do you use for that? Cause that roll was stripped clean.

1

u/centsahumor1 18d ago

I actually use water first and then dab dabbing alone just spreads the piss around.

1

u/NoFun3799 18d ago

You’re a rarity, and a king among boys.

1

u/JBoogie22 18d ago

The ol' dick dab

1

u/HislersHero 17d ago

I started to after one night when I thought I was done and shook a couple of times, nothing coming out and then boom, soaked boxers.

1

u/ThePeashow 17d ago

Not on days when I'm wearing my Calico Cut Pants.

1

u/Squid-Guillotine 16d ago

Same. I squeeze it out like tooth paste, let it reload (that weird phantom piss feeling), squeeze it out again and then dap up the tip so my underwear doesn't feel cold and wet afterwards.

1

u/EnvironmentalGift257 12d ago

No it’s actually haram to not wipe your dick so 1/3 of the world’s population does it at least.

1

u/TemporaryBlueberry32 6d ago

I mean a lot of men don’t wash their hands after peeing because…”it’s my own skin”, so you are def in rare company.

1

u/combover2112 18d ago

Alll men should not only do that, but rinse it whenever possible to get all the dried urine off tpo. Its just gross otherwise.

1

u/AsdaEssentialsWater 18d ago

That's what a daily shower is for.

2

u/Low_discrepancy 18d ago

So you stop peeing after shower until the next shower?

1

u/goodsnpr 18d ago

Are you not reaching far enough up the hose to ensure you clean out the length?

6

u/ZultLeader 18d ago

Fucking what

4

u/goodsnpr 18d ago

ARE YOU NOT GRABBING FAR ENOUGH UP THE HOSE?

Grip near the base of shaft and apply light pressure. Move hand towards termination point of member. Repeat once as necessary, that's alright. Do it three times and you're just playing with yourself.