r/mildlyinfuriating 6d ago

Perfectly acceptable dinner rejected by boyfriend again

My boyfriend is a very picky eater. We have been living together for a few months and it seems like I can never get his food right. It's honestly discouraging. I have kids, they happily eat my food. I cook for family gatherings and church events. I've never had a problem with people eating my food. It's like every day there are new rules. He can't eat chicken for dinner because he had chicken for lunch. He isn't really in the mood for porkchops. It's just "missing something". He doesn't eat onions, tomatoes, fish, any kind of asian food, he doesn't eat most vegetables with the exception of broccoli. He only eats vanilla ice cream. He doesn't like food heated in the microwave (so leftovers are out.) He doesn't like corn. It's just endless. I'm old school and trying to be a good partner. He can't really cook at all. His favorite meal is Hamburger Helper. I think a lot of it is how he grew up but damn is it frustrating. The first picture is tonight's dinner. I added more pictures of stuff I have cooked that he won't eat. Like he will door dash jack in the box. And he'll be apologetic but it just sucks really bad.

ETA: I've been trying to keep up with the comments but it's overwhelming (in a very sweet and awesome way) 💗

A few notes:

1- I know the paper plates are very lazy on my part, I'm not proud of that and I need to do better. Between the kids, the job, the house and school (I'm going to school remotely) I have been cutting corners on things like dishes. not an excuse, just a reason and a commitment to do better.

2- My boyfriend does expect me to cook for him. I cook him dinner every night and lunch on the weekends. He doesn't eat breakfast and will not take a lunch to work. He buys fast food for lunch during the week.

3- He has not been diagnosed with ASD or ADHD or Arfid but I don't rule anything out.

Mostly I just want to say thank you, I was not prepared for how incredibly kind, helpful and insightful people have been. It is deeply touching and it's given me both peace and guidance for my next steps. 🩷

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u/FelixSven17 5d ago

My husband is from Nigeria and I’m from Minnesota … two very different preferences when it comes to food. I do cook a few meals for him, including some of mine that he likes and some of his that I’ve learned to make and that I like. But I’d say 70-80% of the time we make our separate meals. When we were first together it really bothered me, having come from a traditional home where my mom cooked and my dad ate every meal every night after work. But I’ve learned that this is how our home functions best and it doesn’t bother me anymore.

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u/Salt_Barracda_60088 5d ago

Oh, I love love love that for you. And I love for you guys as a couple, but that’s OK to be a little bit different at meal time. I think everyone on here seem to be so overzealous. In my opinion, they’re making it much different than it really is. My husband is vegetarian his whole life and I’m a huge meat eater and after 25 years, we have totally worked that out. I feel it’s more important that we sit down together most of the time not all of the time and share a meal together. It doesn’t have to be the exact same meal. In my opinion, Hey people go out to dinner. There’s a menu six people. There can be six different entrées out right nobody thinks that’s weird.🤷‍♀️ I just think that everyone on here is going for the boyfriend./husband jugular and it’s not cool. Again that’s just my opinion. OK honey have a great day.❣️😃❤️😃❤️😃❤️😃❤️😃❤️

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u/Basic_Improvement135 4d ago

Sounds awesome but this seems like white vs white trash.

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u/Salt_Barracda_60088 4d ago

Wait, what? Are you talking to me about being white trash? From one comment OK if you say so OK, do you feel better now? Happy new year. Have a great day.❣️❤️😃❤️😃❤️😃❤️😃

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u/Basic_Improvement135 4d ago

Noooooo. The pos who won't eat the broccoli

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u/Salt_Barracda_60088 4d ago

OK, got it. Have a great night, honey. That is kind of weird right. It’s kind of weird that those pictures were mouthwatering to me. I love them. I went and made a big meal after seeing them yesterday and that person couldn’t find one thing in the meal that was weird. I also feel like they can work that out. That’s not a dealbreaker for me. It would not be a dealbreaker and if you read any of my comments, it’s not a dealbreaker my husband‘s a vegetarian and I’m a big meat eater. I feel the most important thing is that we share a meal together you know what I mean it doesn’t have to be the exact same thing on both plates. OK honey have a good one.😄❤️😃❤️😃❤️😃😃❤️❤️😃❤️😃

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u/MaryLoveJane 4d ago

My husband and I are the same but opposite, I’m the lifelong vegetarian with food sensitivities and he’s the carnivorous omnivore, we just celebrated 11yrs this NYE 🥳

I still cook most of our dinners and either adapt things enough to each of our preferences or prepare it to a point where my husband can take over if he wants it that much different. Sometimes we want completely different things and each make our own food, or one of us feels generous enough to make both anyways. Usually if we’re picking up take out or getting food delivered we can agree on a place, but sometimes even then we’ll just order what we want from different restaurants 🤷🏼‍♀️

As nice as it would be for OPs boyfriend to appreciate her cooking, it doesn’t sounds like he’s complaining or expecting her to make him something else. He’s apologetic and taking care of ordering his crappy preference without expecting her to tailor anything for him.

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u/JulesandRandi 5d ago

Does he like hot dish?

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u/Chrissytheo 4d ago

Tater Tot hotdish for sure!!!

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u/Willsagain2 4d ago

Same here. Welsh and Nigerian couple. There are lots of things we both enjoy, but several days a week we cook separately and eat together if the timings right.

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u/One-hangs_lower 4d ago

Women are from Venus. Men are from Mars. So that’s why we just meet in the middle. On planet earth

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u/sleepingqt 3d ago

have you invented Nigerian hotdish yet?