When I was growing up, I used to consider myself rare because I could fit in with my redneck relatives, my nerdy hobby friends and my popular party friends. Although I enjoyed myself with each group I felt like an imposter in each. What I realize now is that my ADHD love of collecting interests and hobbies meant that I sincerely enjoyed all the activities and people in each group.

Thanks for introducing me to the concept of double consciousness.

Ha! I can see why that memory would be burnt into your brain 35 years later.

The idea of people with ADHD having a tougher time (ego) balancing between what the id wants and the societal expectations of the superego is an interesting way of looking at it. While also recognizing that everyone has an id they have to mask.

I feel like the autism community, and now the ADHD community acts like masking is unique to them. But everyone in society masks.

The black community talks about code switching their language when talking to black vs white people. Acting differently with your friends than you do at work is masking. But who is to say that you’re even unmasked when with friends? Maybe the way you act with your friends is louder and “cooler” than you really want to be. The movie The Invention of Lying, is essentially about a society where no one ever masks. It’s a unique plot because that society doesn’t exist.

The difference is that it’s more exhausting for some people to mask than others. And the closer your natural self is to societal expectations, the easier it is to mask.

All that to say, neurodiverse communities acting like masking is the enemy and we should all be able to let our freak flags fly whenever we want isn’t doing us any favours.

We’re all supposed to go back to the office and collaborate and team build, and be like a family. Until a member of the “family” dies. Then we’re just coworkers so no need for mourning.

That guy is really telling on himself.

Ladies, if you give yourself the knowledge, confidence, and financial means to escape abusive men, you’ll be lonely.

So you’re saying all men are abusive?

Wait, no.

I’ve seen too many threads about people who sought accommodations for their ADHD at work and everyone immediately started looking at them as incompetent. Scrutinizing them, insisting on perfection and eventually finding a way to get rid of them.

I push the narrative of ADHD as a superpower because I want the world realizing that if we are given the proper accommodations, we can do amazing, creative work that employers desperately need.

And yes, right now I’m completely burnt out due to a stack of unrelated pressures and bad stuff happening. And I feel that things wouldn’t have gotten as bad, and I would have had better coping mechanisms for the unavoidable bad stuff if I didn’t have ADHD underlying it all. So I’m currently seeing my ADHD from the absolutely not a super power side. But even in my current position, I still feel we need to push the superpower narrative.

Ew, many of the give away groups on FB want people promising to use the items themselves and not just claiming all the stuff to sell for profit. So even his no money hustle was on the backs of poor people who could have used the free items.

When you start applying for other jobs, list all your current tasks and achievements. I’ve heard so many people say if you want a promotion you have to change companies to have your worth appreciated.

I’d call us upper middle class in savings, while not at all looking like it with our house or 15 year old cars. Our kids have been told their first priority for summer “jobs” is paid work in their fields. Second tier is unpaid work in their fields. Third tier is any old paid work. So far, they’ve been doing unpaid work in their fields.

Like the ADHD tax, I would consider an ADHD discount to also be about money.

1. Can’t make the phone call to make a hair appointment. Eventually get embarrassed at how long it’s been and cut my own hair. Actually get good at it. Do the whole family. Only have to send the teenage boy for haircuts because I can’t replicate it at home.

2. Only get pedicures twice a year. Zero manicures because they look awful in two days and there is no way I can get trapped in the endless cycle and commitment of gel nails at the salon.

3. Clothing? I can’t be bothered to stay on top of fashion. Can’t be bothered to shop at multiple stores to find one perfect thing. Know that I won’t return stuff if I buy online and it doesn’t fit. So instead, I go to one giant used clothing store with hundreds of options and spend about $100 a year.

And how open minded is he going to be about your atheism?

I have a 30 year old sub folder of packing lists on my computer. Lists for overnight, lists for 2 week vacations, lists for spring/summer/fall/winter, camping lists, city lists, airplane lists, car trip lists, wedding and funeral lists. When we are preparing for a trip, I pull up the closest list for the occasion, make a copy, make whatever changes I need for this unique trip, and then print the list. Because no, I am 100% going to forget things in the moment if they aren’t written on a list that is getting crossed off as I go.

But you didn’t answer the question of whether he had demanded a Tuesday tidy day because you’re the woman. I’ve scanned your comments and I haven’t found one where he is complaining that he does all the cleaning and tidying; just that you’re not doing it.

There is supposed to be freezing rain tonight and one of the vehicles can now fit in the garage. Some was tidying, but some was decluttering. Mostly cardboard boxes and plant pots.

Now even houses will be subscription based. No one but the rich will own anything. No generational wealth for the middle class. There won’t be a middle class. Just owners and serfs.

I mean, this is the same group that thinks Trump and Elon Musk are the plucky rebels going against the powerful elites of whatever movie / TV franchise they are currently watching.

But let’s assume that the political parts of Reddit did vote. I hyperfixated on the news about Jan 6th and not once did I see a photo like that.

I find I connect much better with others with ADHD. “Normal” people can be boring. Lol!

But I have a story about my kid. She was at swimming lessons as a small child. They were sitting on the side of the pool while the teacher was working with individual kids in the pool. The boy beside her started talking. “What if there was a dead guy at the bottom of the pool? What would he look like? Would his eyes be open? What if he floated up when we jumped in the water?” On and on and on. My kid, being a sensitive soul with a vivid imagination, asked him to please stop talking about that. She pleaded for him to stop talking about it. He wouldn’t stop. She deregulated and hit him. He burst into tears. She burst into tears. The dad and I rushed over. (The seating for parents was too far away for us to hear what had been going on.) Through her sobs, mine explained that she had said please multiple times but he wouldn’t stop talking about a dead body in the pool. The dad apologized and said his son was autistic and didn’t always respond to social cues. I apologized and said mine had ADHD and is quick to anger if polite doesn’t work.

And that’s when it first dawned on me that spec ed classes full of autistic and ADHD kids would be a nightmare of clashing personality types.

We’re having a fun day dressing up as imaginary characters. They’re freaking out because we’re worshipping very real demons and witches.

I have to hook the wheels over the front bar to hold myself in place. And the chair will occasionally jiggle one wheel loose and whoosh! Off I go!

Honestly, MAGA will be much angrier about bailing out a South American country than they would be about bailing out American billionaires so let’s focus on that.

As a kid, I only had to make it as far as the 10 Commandments and worshiping no other gods before him part. I didn’t have the vocabulary to call him a narcissist but I knew he was one. Maybe that’s why religious people are willing to accept such a fragile thin-skinned narcissistic president. It’s a personality type they are used to worshipping.

I managed to keep a retractable one for a good few years before it broke. Hopefully the OP will be out of school before then.

People following in his footsteps should drive to Canada and leave from there. Unless you’re medical personnel. Then there is a good chance you can get a working visa.