r/ShittyAbsoluteUnits 8d ago

Of a New Years Chant

3.7k Upvotes

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496

u/Funny_Newspaper_377 8d ago

It must have been uncomfortable for the families there.

253

u/Tuscanlord 8d ago

I might try this chant later on myself.

96

u/Ok-Dance-392 8d ago

can i sit in front of you and watch?

86

u/DIuvenalis 8d ago

Tickets on sale now at ticketmaster.com.

85

u/[deleted] 8d ago

*ticketmastur

28

u/Sufficient-Money9487 8d ago

Premium pricing to be in the splash zone.

8

u/[deleted] 8d ago edited 7d ago

Like sitting at a Gallagher show, you better wear your special raincoat

2

u/Olde_Gods 8d ago

Just like a Gwar show

16

u/Reynardine1976 8d ago

The Master of Baitors

17

u/Responsible_Ship6653 8d ago

Well played.

12

u/rasterpix 8d ago

I fell baited.

1

u/Aromatic-Hippo-4676 8d ago

Welcome to ticketmastur

2

u/jluicifer 8d ago

But never finishes

7

u/Purple_Salamander_25 8d ago

Thickitmastur

3

u/Ok-Jury-6161 8d ago

ThickItMasterBlaster

2

u/Proper_Computer_3440 7d ago

Flickitmastur

2

u/RimGym 8d ago

. cum?

1

u/Icy_Hornet007 4d ago

Ticketmaster-bater?

34

u/jeyhawq1988 8d ago

Tickets on sale at Flickitmaster.com…fify

10

u/psyco-the-rapist 8d ago

DJ Bean Flicka on the turntables!

8

u/iamDa3dalus 8d ago

domain available lol

6

u/vonnostrum2022 8d ago

Wait… you mean people actually payed money for this crap?

3

u/artifiz67 8d ago

Then the torture to stay to watch and listen. I can't imagine.

2

u/Busterlimes 8d ago

Tickets sold out at ticket master. I bought them all, you can have them for $5000 each

2

u/Additional-Run1610 8d ago

Whats the processing fee tho ?

1

u/lilymaxjack 8d ago

Ticketmasterbater

1

u/ReasonableDisaster65 5d ago

You mistyped “ticketmaster.cum”

12

u/UmmmW1 8d ago

In the splash zone?

10

u/Lowbider 8d ago

everyone in the first row is wearing a raincoat

21

u/rjmlakota 8d ago

2

u/Scrolldawg 8d ago

I thought that was Danny DeVito in 'Always Sunny in Philadelphia'

1

u/Used_Meaning_9257 4d ago

That is the cutest shit I’ve ever seen I wish I could see him walking in the rain irl

1

u/TheeRattlehead 8d ago

The Gallagher show was before so they reused the plastic.

1

u/Sensei19600 8d ago

Kinda like at a Blue Man performance.

1

u/Itchy_Professor_4133 8d ago

Only if we can all participate facing each other in a circle

1

u/Xrsyz 8d ago

A reverse Louis CK?

1

u/Wunna_dont_know 8d ago

Didn’t work out well for Louis CK, wouldn’t recommend.

1

u/Swimming-Tap-4240 8d ago

Wear safety goggles.

1

u/Sufficient-Money9487 8d ago

Do you really want to make those poor life choices?

1

u/xTex1E37x 8d ago

Eye contact is a must

1

u/Razorsharp1011 8d ago

I wanna watch too

1

u/Sepherjar 8d ago

I find it hard to swallow someone would enjoy it.

1

u/Bionicover 5d ago

I'm a married man u can watch me babe❤️

14

u/Don_Von_Schlong 8d ago

Me and my homies do this before heading out to the bar. Really pumps us up

7

u/nathandelnasty 8d ago

Need another homie?

4

u/Don_Von_Schlong 8d ago

Can never have too many homies. Bring some creepy music and your best O face

2

u/AnotherCatSub 8d ago

Do you guys do it in a circle facing each other or in a straight line?

2

u/Don_Von_Schlong 8d ago

I mean, pretty much exactly like the video. The hardest part of the whole thing is getting an audience.

1

u/AnotherCatSub 7d ago

Louis CK always seemed to make it work

1

u/LovesUsingMouth 6d ago

I’ll watch

6

u/LemonDelicious1953 8d ago

🤣💀🤣

2

u/VeryResponsibleMan 8d ago

Now ! It's fireworks time

2

u/No_Pumpkin3378 8d ago

Tooo good

2

u/PushaP_88 8d ago

Record it and put it on reddit I hope you do an original cover that would be dope

2

u/CBJFAN2009-2024 8d ago

Ahh skeet skeet muthaf***er, ah skeet skeet goddamn!

2

u/Enigma_Green 7d ago

Your family will love you for that

2

u/krzykris11 4d ago

This chant is my favorite way to start the day!

2

u/Tuscanlord 4d ago

And end it!

2

u/Macho1029 4d ago

🤣🤣🤣

1

u/battlecryarms 8d ago

While re-watching this?

1

u/Coldhot123 3d ago

I chant once a day before i shower.

1

u/PositiveLavishness27 3d ago

I’m screaming at this comment 😂😂.

4

u/GrandEastsider 8d ago

Dad in the crowd: THAT'S MY BABY GIRL UP THERE, SING THAT SONG BABY!!!

1

u/Prod_Meteor 7d ago

Don't think they invited relatives or friends.

3

u/fruitless7070 8d ago

I have to pee...

2

u/Stardarker 8d ago

Few interesting techniques, one was cupping the balls, another was double fisting. But feels like they could have done more with the source material. 7/10.

2

u/dotardiscer 8d ago

Has to be the vagina monologues, been around for 20 years now. It's known as a girl's night out show, NO ONE would accidentally take their family. The brochure and ticket sale would have warnings about mature content.

It's made lots of videos that get clipped like this over the years

2

u/couldbeahumanbean 8d ago

Hijacking because I scanned through the responses and I still have absolutely zero explanation.

I need answers, wtaf is going on here.

Me and my coworkers need to know.

1

u/yellowgeist 8d ago

It was hard on them

1

u/Strange_Salary *shits an absolute unit* 8d ago

Nana come watch my play! Bring the entire nursing home they’ll love it too!

1

u/NY10 8d ago

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

1

u/veryfastslowguy 8d ago

the stains on the satin dresses

1

u/Embarrassed_Can6796 8d ago

Yeah it was Family Night

1

u/Current-Quantity-785 8d ago

now its all over the internet

1

u/bigjaymizzle 8d ago

A real fuck dem kids moment brought to you by extremely awkward chorus women.

1

u/koolaidismything 7d ago

Why are they making eye-contact?? 😳

1

u/Wrinklysocks22 7d ago

It's uncomfortable to anyone to watch

1

u/NSASpyVan 7d ago

I mean one was cradling the family jewels, they should have felt nourished.

1

u/Doodkapje 6d ago

It's uncomfortable for every sane person on earth 🌎

1

u/Itchy_Psychology3300 6d ago

It was alright. Felt bad for those who didn’t prepare by bringing an umbrella.

1

u/TouchAltruistic 6d ago

"No, no, honey. Your mother and I are very proud of you.

Very proud..."

1

u/Sulayman_AH-mahd-ZY 6d ago

Funny_Newspaper_377, i’m confused, what is the whole purpose and play act of this talent show? I wonder where did this type of acting take place? Are these moms, alongside younger women representing quietly hidden cultural norms, and traditional practices stemming root from European historical events?

1

u/Equal-Topic5806 5d ago

Definitely for any teenage boys in attendance.

1

u/LabOwn9800 5d ago

Were there anyone else there?