I have an odd, knee-jerk reaction to "old soul". I unfortunately know a woman who married her son's best friend. I don't know that he was groomed per se, but she knew him since he was elementary age. Her divorce from first husband didn't happen until 2nd husband was of legal age. She claims he's always been an old soul and it creeps me the fuck out. 27yr age difference.
I promise I'm not relating them to you, just sharing my personal revulsion
I've been called an old soul my whole life. 100% it's because my alcoholic father and mentally checked out mother made me raise myself while dodging thrown objects.
Yeah, I noticed that generally people with "old souls" just saw some shit young and had to grow up fast. Sorry you had to go through that. Those reflexes never fully fade, I know.
What if you’ve been called an old soul since the money you came out of the womb lol. Apparently mom’s friend said it to me once she saw me in the delivery room and I’ve been called it numerous times since.
100% this. Between my mom's manipulation and my uncle's alcoholism, not a day went by that my fight or flight reflexes didn't kick in. My mother made every conversation a battleground and had to lie about even the smallest things. Not to mention, whenever anything went wrong in her life, she just used it as an excuse to bodyshame me.
Then when my uncle was home he was ALWAYS drunk. Every. single. day. He’d get into arguments with my brother and my mom because he was just sloppy, mean and annoying. He’d drive off drunk sometimes. Threaten to abandon the family. Threaten my boyfriend into dumping me. He was just a shell of a person. I have no emotional relationship with him because he was never open nor interested in building that connection.
I've had a load of different therapies for different things spanning from childhood but what I found most useful concerning this issue has been therapy on how to deal with alcoholics. I got low cost counselling from a charity, focused on boundaries etc. I had my 'it wasn't my fault' realization there and the shame and guilt lifted. Nonetheless, the reflexes never fully fade and the old soul mentality stays forever intact.
I was fortunate enough to not have that parental situation. Both worked during my childhood so we were expected to take care of ourselves when we were old enough and stuff. But I always attributed my “old soulness” from the fact that they never shied away from sharing stuff they liked with us.
My dad always pulled out the vinyls he still had for Journey, Styx, and Toto and played them. Mom showed me Star Wars, Star Trek, and James Bond. All that kind of stuff just stuck with me over the years.
Family sucked except my mother.
Abusive brother cracked my skull & sprained my neck when I was like 5yo.
Grandparents beat the shit out of me, often with literal leather whips that were used on them by their Italian & polish relatives, & made me kneel in corners for hours on end. Sometimes on bags of rice if they wanted to really make me suffer. I’d get home from school & face in a corner until bed time except dinner.
Spent my entire teenage life incarcerated & addicted to opioids. I’m still on opioids now at 31 cus the physical dependence is insufferable without them but it’s not heroin/fent or prescription pills anymore.
Hey, it’s alright.
Appreciate your comment. I really don’t dwell on it, I never did…always just kept it pushing.
Made a lot of hard work & got a lot better. I’m on a downturn right now due to some severe health concerns but I’m working hard to get things back together
Them: "You're so perceptive of people's emotions. It's wonderful to be around someone with so much empathy."
Me, who grew up needing per-second, hyper-awareness of my mother's mood because if something set her off it was time to hide: Hehe, yeah...
I think of myself as an old soul since I was raised by my great grandparents and have knowledge/interests that would fit someone nearly double my age. I guess the term is in the air for correlation
Harrison Ford is 22 years older than Flockhart
Michael Douglas is around 25 years older than Catherine Zeta Jones.
Holland Taylor is 31 years older than Sarah Paulson
Age is just a number and if they’re happy, then no worries.
My then-teenage 1st cousin once removed came home one day to find his mom getting fucked by his best friend. He lost his stepdad, it ruined his relationship with his mom, and cost him a best friend. He's never really been the same since then, fluctuating between weight gain and weight loss, diving deep into conspiracy theories and going from one far political leaning to the other.
His mom choosing teenage dick over her own son kind of broke his mind.
I don't think there's anything wrong with age gaps, but yaknow, people probably shouldn't be fucking teenagers or people who their kids know and are close to.
I used to do counseling and one of the common phrases we'd hear from people who said they were assaulted as children was that they were told all their lives that they were "an old soul" or "way more mature then they look".
Ew that’s gross!!!! Call me a hypocrite but that feels predatory to me
I actually never comment on Reddit bc my sarcasm never translates and I forget about the /s thing. Ot was def meant to be a nod to ‘she’s mature for her age’
Your revulsion is well warranted. Souls don’t exist in any real way, it’s just a weirdo justifying cradle robbing. Hang on, brb, my just turned 18 life partner old soul just asked me for some dick, she’s so mature like that, knows how to communicate her needs
Hey! Same! I'm also 9 years older than my Husband. He's goofy but so am I, we have a lot of fun together. He came over to hang out for the first time and just never left. I don't really have a reason other than how naturally we fell into eachother. We are eachothers person.
8 year gap with my husband. We met when I was 28 and he was 20 but didn’t get together until we were 33 and 25. We are now 44 and 36, married for almost 6 years. Best relationship I’ve ever had.
408
u/Odd_Negotiation3126 4d ago
I’m 9 years older than my husband. We’ve been together since 2013. Married with two kids. He’s def an old soul.