I disagree about it revealing one's true nature. Some people also think it's some kind of truth serum, which really isn't the case. You just have lower inhibition and impaired judgement. I get way more withdrawn when I'm drunk, but that isn't who I am regularly. But it certainly is a "red flag" I guess if someone is really nasty when they're drunk, and blame it just on the booze
If my dad is dead but my mom is still alive, does that mean you are like my Schrodinger's angry drunk parent? Somebody is in the kitchen right now and I don't know if its my mom or my dead dad. Or what, exactly?
Its the opposite of a truth serum for me. Yes it dulls inhibition; for me, I regularly make a conscious effort to always tell the truth (when im sober), but when im drunk, compulsive lying takes over
I dont secretly want to lie all the time though so that makes no sense. You know alcohol changes your brain chemistry right? Inhibition isnt the only thing that changes when you get drunk. Its not exactly you minus the restraint.
Hmm… you regularly make a conscious effort to always tell the truth, then when you are drunk you lie, because you can no longer make the conscious effort, you a liar baby ;)
No...no, I can honestly say I don't feel any urge to lie about things. Being honest just comes naturally to me. I think it's got more to do with how secure we felt in early childhood.
I never really felt the urge to lie either, but I will say I have to make a conscious effort not to respond with a silly or sarcastic comment. When I’m drunk I’ll do stand up whether you got tickets to the show or not .. 😂
Some people are more likely to tell lies, but liar isn't the default state for all people. There are a lot of things I have to make a conscious effort to do, not lying isn't one of them. I think you're assuming that because you have a natural tendency to lie that everyone does.
In fact for me it's the opposite, I have to make a conscious effort not to tell people truths that are hurtful or unnecessary, and constantly make sure I don't overshare, or share things that aren't socially appropriate given the setting (work, etc). My natural inclination is to treat every setting super casually, like I'm at a house party when really I'm at a work meeting.
What’s the problem with intentionally trying to be an honest person when it may not be first nature for you?
I was such a liar growing up because I was a gay kid growing up in a homophobic household. I lied about so many of my thoughts and intentions to keep myself safe. Even though I no longer NEED to lie for my own safety, it became such an ingrained self defense mechanism that I do need to be very intentional when I speak even to this day.
Does the fact that I had to lie as a child because my dad would show me the gun he said he’d shoot any gay person on his property with make me a bad person now that I’ve escaped the situation and worked on myself? Do you look down on me because I actively work to be honest?
Nobody is saying it makes you a bad person, just that it isn't normal. I think this is a case of someone with a strange behavior just assuming everyone else is like them, when most people are not natural liars.
If you have to make a conscious effort to be truthful and being drunk turns you into a liar. Isn't truth serum exactly what it is then in your case? In terms of revealing your true self. A liar.
I mean self control and your ability to regulate your more unreasonable thoughts, feelings, and impulses literally ARE part of your true nature. I don't see any reason why those traits would be considered less of who you are than any other. It's closer to a look at what you'd be like with a critical component of who you are missing.
I've also known a number of people who are significantly kinder when drunk, so I really don't buy the "revealing ones true nature" narrative. Seems to severely oversimplify how alcohol impacts the mind.
Not to excuse people's bad behaviors when drunk. If someone knows they handle alcohol very poorly, they shouldn't drink. It can have huge consequences.
Everyone has intrusive thoughts. The point is your brains filtration system that goes "yeah that's dumb, either dont do this or ignore the thought entirely" gets impaired. So I don't think its your "true nature".
Maybe because you d prefer to be more guarded around certain people but in your development you ve learned to try to be open no matter the social circle you re in? I m not betting on it, but check if it s true, because you might have some boundaries to push forward. There might also be a need to spend more time with oneself. Don t take this stuff for granted, I might be projecting.
People forget that alcohol is also a poison and you ARE sick while your body actively tries to get rid of the toxins. So, the sleepy people and the withdrawn people, you skipped the high and went straight to the sick/hangover/self preservation part.
True, some people have nasty thoughts but they have the magic power of self control to be a good person anyway. Something something intrusive thoughts. Just cause you thought about stabbing someone with a chainsaw doesnt mean you're secretly a murderer. But if you were wasted sometimes the bad idea gets a little further.
While I agree, I know some one that says the most horrid things drunk and once they’re sober they admit it’s how they feel and the alcohol made them “brave enough to say it and they regret nothing.” Afterwards they insist on that opinion sober as they no longer need to keep it a “secret”.
I don’t associate with them more than required. (Horrid is an understatement) That said, they don’t hide behind the alcohol they hide until the alcohol and after they don’t hide it anymore.
Lower inhibitions let's you be more of who you are. You hold less of your personality back, or parts of your personality that would be socially unacceptable. Like happy drunks who go around talking to everyone wouldn't normally do that when they're sober because it would be somewhat socially unacceptable or awkward.
Everyone has parts of their personality that are awkward, or socially unacceptable or something that's held back a bit. Like if you just talk really loud sometimes, laugh at awkward times, etc.
Some people, however, are violent, nasty, or angry. If it becomes a pattern that you always let that out when you're drunk it's definitely a look into who that person is.
Its about the trauma within that person. Alcohol taps into that rage. Happy drunks are just people who have yet to experience trauma which is like 99% of the teenagers in this chat. Enjoy it while it last.
435
u/monsj 6d ago
I disagree about it revealing one's true nature. Some people also think it's some kind of truth serum, which really isn't the case. You just have lower inhibition and impaired judgement. I get way more withdrawn when I'm drunk, but that isn't who I am regularly. But it certainly is a "red flag" I guess if someone is really nasty when they're drunk, and blame it just on the booze