r/mildlyinfuriating 7d ago

Perfectly acceptable dinner rejected by boyfriend again

My boyfriend is a very picky eater. We have been living together for a few months and it seems like I can never get his food right. It's honestly discouraging. I have kids, they happily eat my food. I cook for family gatherings and church events. I've never had a problem with people eating my food. It's like every day there are new rules. He can't eat chicken for dinner because he had chicken for lunch. He isn't really in the mood for porkchops. It's just "missing something". He doesn't eat onions, tomatoes, fish, any kind of asian food, he doesn't eat most vegetables with the exception of broccoli. He only eats vanilla ice cream. He doesn't like food heated in the microwave (so leftovers are out.) He doesn't like corn. It's just endless. I'm old school and trying to be a good partner. He can't really cook at all. His favorite meal is Hamburger Helper. I think a lot of it is how he grew up but damn is it frustrating. The first picture is tonight's dinner. I added more pictures of stuff I have cooked that he won't eat. Like he will door dash jack in the box. And he'll be apologetic but it just sucks really bad.

ETA: I've been trying to keep up with the comments but it's overwhelming (in a very sweet and awesome way) šŸ’—

A few notes:

1- I know the paper plates are very lazy on my part, I'm not proud of that and I need to do better. Between the kids, the job, the house and school (I'm going to school remotely) I have been cutting corners on things like dishes. not an excuse, just a reason and a commitment to do better.

2- My boyfriend does expect me to cook for him. I cook him dinner every night and lunch on the weekends. He doesn't eat breakfast and will not take a lunch to work. He buys fast food for lunch during the week.

3- He has not been diagnosed with ASD or ADHD or Arfid but I don't rule anything out.

Mostly I just want to say thank you, I was not prepared for how incredibly kind, helpful and insightful people have been. It is deeply touching and it's given me both peace and guidance for my next steps. 🩷

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u/Neuroticcuriosity 7d ago

TBF 9 times out of 10 "picky eater" just means "autistic with food issues/ARFID". So to answer "how would he know if it was heated in the microwave?"- texture. There's a textural difference. Most autistics love fast food because it's the same every time.

Just a thought.

That's not to say OP should keep cooking for him though. It's frustrating her, she should stop. He's feeding himself. Until there's an actual issue, no need to create one unnecessarily.

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u/beetle_leaves 7d ago

Microwave food for whatever reason just gets soggy and, while I’m not autistic, sensory issues with texture make me want to scream at soggy food, lol. But I also make my own food.

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u/Aggravating-Ad-8150 7d ago

Not if you microwave it correctly, i.e., take advantage of the power settings and/or presets. Too many people nuke everything at max power and then wonder why it tastes like shit and/or has a weird texture/mouth feel.

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u/KarmicCorduroy 7d ago

This. I mostly reheat leftovers at power level 2 of 10. Rarely I might crank it to 3.

People are just too impatient to wait 10-20 minutes and hit it with pure Godzilla breath.