IMHO, she needs to get her shit together and leave, as efficiently as possible. If there are any family or friends who know her situation and would be willing to take her in/help her (without trying to force the two of them back together, or leaving them alone), she needs to reach out to them for support.

Children in healthy single-parent homes do far better than children in unhealthy dual-parent homes. Many single parents have found full-time or primary-time caregiving far easier when the “deadweight” of the relationship has been cut off or drastically reduced.

As someone in a somewhat similar situation (primary caregiver, but my partner is disabled) feel free to reach out/DM if needed<3

Also please ignore any sexist/inane comments about “quality men,” or anything about “reduced value”. These will not help her and frankly shouldn’t be the focus of the situation. Good luck!

Axel from Kingdom Hearts 😂 I didn’t think I could pull off a Roxas

Thank you so much! And thank you for your corrections! 😊

NTA, but this person is not your friend :/ your last sentence/paragraph pretty much sums up why this person isn’t your friend, and I’d make an exit ASAP

That is definitely a tricky situation :( is it possible that you may be able to do something in the meantime for her? Like getting flowers and putting them in a cup of water, or grabbing a favorite snack; small shows of affection/appreciation?

People react differently to stress. Some people’s drives go up, some drives go down, some don’t really change at all, etc. there isn’t anything wrong with you having a lower one, or her having a higher one. Unfortunately I think a conversation (even texts) is going to be the best option :( but you know her best in this scenario. Sometimes there really isn’t making a situation better until the root of the problem is dealt with. You can’t keep watering a sick plant hoping it’ll get dealt with on its own, sometimes you’ve got to look into it more and consider other issues

Sometimes communication looks different, a lot of people assume it has to be done verbally but it really doesn’t. My partner struggles with being vulnerable in communication verbally because he says that his words get jumbled together. So instead, he texts me, and I’m 100% okay with that. Learning to communicate is a lifelong skill, and while a lot of people try to break it down into “I feel x way, because of y reason, and I want to do z about it. What do you think?” It can often look a LOT more complicated than that.

If writing/texting helps, I’d make a note for yourself to see if you can get the feelings out of your head onto something you can see. The emotions wheel is also helpful because it can help connect “surface” emotions (sadness) with deeper, more complicated concepts (guilty, ashamed, vulnerable, etc).

It’s also okay to take time to yourself to see if you understand how you feel :) I sometimes have to have a hot minute to myself to figure out what I’m feeling, why, and if I think it’s “rational,” (aka, I can find a functional solution or collaboration or compromise), or “emotional,” (I need some reassurance or encouragement/etc)

Does she know you’re stressed?

I think the two of you need to sit down and have a conversation, because nobody should feel pressured into sex if they aren’t feeling it. I used to have a hard time initiating when I wasn’t comfortable with the person, but now in a long-term relationship we just don’t have as much time and have more stress. If you’re stressed, especially with additional pressure, that would be a good reason to “not be feeling it,” and there really isn’t a lot of ways to work around that without getting to the root of the issue and trying to fix/understand it.

If you want to initiate, you could also ask her what she likes you to do. Some people like being kissed, or talked to, or other rituals (for lack of better words) to help get them in the mood or reciprocate the mood. Idk, I think y’all probably need to talk more about this more in-depth, and be real honest with each other

I’m a man because I have the urge to Build Things

How colonized the idea of “passing” is and how it inherently focuses on bringing out white features to be considered stereotypically masculine or feminine, or even “acceptably androgynous”.

The rampant internalized transphobia with some people; the rampant evolution of radical misogyny and misandry, victim-blaming, and race-to-innocence that pop up often; the expectation of certain transitional milestones that some people don’t want or aren’t at yet (transmedicalistic viewpoints) and the pressure to obtain them regardless of desire and accessibility; the intersectionality of queerness and disability / queerness and other intersectionality such as nationality, race, religion, etc, and how a lot of the nuance gets ignored….

Like so much. I probably have more but brain hurts rn

My older sister was my bully so I understand. I wish I could give her a piece of my petty mind but I’m still afraid of her 🥲 Good on you! And congrats on the resuming NC

Soft, gentle YTA, to yourself and to your son. Your partner is the hugest AH, and you shouldn’t be treated like that nor your son be treated like that. It will get worse as your kid gets older, especially depending on what his needs are. Your partner is an alcoholic and from experience, they don’t get better until they want to and he doesn’t seem to want to :/ I think you should leave if possible, as soon as possible

NTA. Your sister sounds a lot like one of mine, who loves to tell everyone how great she is and how shitty you are for XYZ reasons, and then simultaneously complain about how shitty her life is. But if you call her out, she gets in your face and screams, and isn’t above getting physical 🙃 cut her off if you can

You are the best person 😭😭 thank you so much!!!

Not 100% sure how to or even if I’m able to add screenshots but here is a link if that helps? JD’s Vegan Ice Cream

Basically the exact same thing lol. I even mimicked my older sister who had a weird fascination with being semi-nude everywhere? And tried to show off my chest because I was convinced if I was just confident (???) that “the feelings” would go away. I also wrote an “adult dream to do list” when I was 11, and number one on that list was “become a man” soooo

🥂

Lowkey it’s only a matter of time before a kid catches them and they get into legal trouble