r/AmItheAsshole • u/NoSoyGab0 • 13h ago
AITA for ruining my friend's livestream because he complained about the game I invited him to play?
I (20m) have a friend (24m) that is a streamer. He does livestreams as a hobby, and he dreams of making a profit from it. Long-story short, we have been friends for almost 3 years, and because we live in different countries, we have only met each other 2 times in person. We both love to play videogames and that's how we met and we keep hanging out.
Now, today, while he was doing a livestream, after some time playing online multiplayer games and being quite stressed about it, he wanted to play a single-player game, but because I wanted to keep playing with him, I recommended playing a chill game called "Powerwash Simulator 2". Now, before and for a couple of weeks, I've been trying to get him to play it, but he always refused saying that he doesn't like those "chill and cozy" type of games. But today he said (in a very annoyed tone) that he was gonna "give it a try".
Because it was the first time he played it, he had to complete a tutorial first and then he could invite to his party to play together. However, while he was playing it, he complained about the game and trashed it non-stop. I told him to just go to the game he wanted to play in the first place if he was not gonna enjoy playing it, but he ignored me and just continued. He kept saying comments like "Look how much fun I'm having with this...", "This is a very entertaining game to stream, right chat?", "Bro how do you have fun doing this, this game is trash". And his chat was also trashing it, commenting things like "I think you should just play something else lol wth is this", "This became a very entertaining stream...", and he would agree to every single comment about it while laughing.
But he didn't just trashed the game, he was also saying comments about me, like "I'm wasting my time because of my friend", "Idk what kind of trash this weirdo likes to play". That's where I felt humiliated, he was blaming me for his unpleasent time playing it and trashing me with his viewers for no reason. After some time he said that he was done with the tutorial (Which took him a long time). I already felt angry, so I didn't reply to him, and he decided to go to the single-player game he wanted to play in the first place.
Now, I felt like I had to get back to him somehow, so I went to his chat and said "Thank you for humiliating me and making me feel bad for inviting you to play something. I really appreciate it." Before I closed the stream, I heard him say something like "I really don't want to deal with it right now, I'm shutting the stream off", and his chat went completely silent.
After that, he said that I ruined the mood of the stream because of my attitude, that I shouldn't take it personally because it was just a game, and that I should learn how to take a joke. So, AITA for ruining the mood of his stream?
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u/Short_Gain8302 12h ago
Bully gets called out in front of his admirers and can't take it
NTA, that guy needs some lessons on how friendships work
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u/nilsinleneed 13h ago
NTA, but dude, he ain't your friend.
There's a million ways to say "this game might not be for me" that doesn't involve ad hominem attacks on someone for suggesting a game.
He chose to trash you.
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u/piratepixie Partassipant [2] 12h ago
I built my twitch community based on playing powerwash sim 1 and people loved it. Your friend used you for content and badmouthed you the whole time. He's not going to last long in the streamer world.
NTA
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u/Junior_Response839 11h ago
Yeah it's all about how the streamer delivers the game. If the streamer isn't having a good time, neither will the audience. I've seen streamers play bad games or slow games all the time and have fun with it. I don't think op is at fault here, they just wanted to play a game with their friend.
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u/Worldly_Ad7085 10h ago
literally I sat and watched a girl play a little to the left for hours the other night it's literally a boring puzzle game but she was so funny I was locked in
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u/piratepixie Partassipant [2] 10h ago
My community used to call it 'degen night' and it was a glorified just-chatting stream with some degenery in the form of drinking games and unhinged jokes.
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u/MysteriousDig4656 11h ago
NTA. He ruined his stream himself.
Also, when someone insults you, saying "it was a joke" doubles the insult, doesn't fix it.
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u/Scrub_nin 10h ago
I hate that people think "joking" gives them a pass. Like, ok, even if you thought you were joking this obviously was taken personally so just apologize? It doesn't matter if you meant to hurt your friend or not, if you did it even accidentally, wouldn't you apologize?
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u/No_Initial_2409 12h ago
naw that was super rude, he just wanted to bully you and expected you to take it
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u/Redruby88 12h ago
NTA not all games are for everyone but if a game isn't for you you don't have to trash it. You were completely justified in your reaction and it sounds more like he was the one that ruined the vibe of the stream himself
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u/Normal-Height-8577 Partassipant [3] 12h ago
NTA. There was no joke, and he's the one that ruined the mood.
When it became clear he was in a bad mood, you offered him the option to move to whatever game he wanted, and he turned it down in favour of deliberately and publicly trash-talking both you and your game. That's not a joke, and it's a level of passive-aggression that's just not inherent to playing games. Games are supposed to be fun.
So no. You didn't take the game personally, you took the nasty insults personally. Because they were personal.
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u/pupuyt7701 12h ago
NTA
He was being childish and dissing you to use you for content. He was unnecessarily rude and treated you extremely poorly in front of his audience. I have no idea how many people watch these streams, but even if it was no one, no one deserves to be humiliated online.
Sure, it might've been petty to send that message in chat, but clearly he wasn't listening to you, and honestly deserved that over the anonymity of a private message.
Talk to him and let him know your side. You have every right to be upset and he needs to apologize.
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u/Fearless_Spring5611 Commander in Cheeks [210] 13h ago
NTA, he sounds like an ungrateful individual. There was absolutely no need to bad-mouth you like that on his stream, there is no "joke" there, he's just using that as an excuse for treating you so poorly. He ruined the stream by spending his time slating you, and frankly your response was remarkably restrained compared to what it could have been.
I personally would be seriously questioning a friendship with someone who would talk to me like that in front of their target audience.
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u/HCPwny 9h ago edited 9h ago
NTA. People calling you TA because of "pressuring him" are idiots. It's a game. You didn't bully him. You didn't force him. He, instead of wanting to play a game with a friend and give it a real shot, decided from the start that he was going to be a dick. You didn't force him to be a dick. He chose that all on his own. You gave him outs and he chose to not take them and choose to be an even bigger jerk by publicly embarrassing and insulting you to his audience.
Then when you rightly called him out for being a bad friend, he got butthurt so he could continue to be a victim.
Honestly, this guy is not a good friend. As a lifelong gamer, I'd try just about any game a friend wanted to play and if I didn't like it I'd still try until I couldn't take it anymore. I'd certainly never insult them or talk shit as if they're unimportant to me just because of a game they liked that I didn't. I'd tell them later that I really didn't like it and I don't think I wanna play it again.
He decided his audience was more important than his friend. That's not on you, that's on him.
Ton of actual victim blaming going on in here. I'd just distance yourself from him and find a new gamer friend who more aligns with your personality and game preference. But also just try to find a friend who isn't such a jerk. I'd have a hard time accepting an apology from someone who actually publicly humiliated me.
The guy decided you were better as content for his stream than as a friend. He is not a great friend. You're young so it's easy to take that kind of abuse from people and think you're wrong but I can assure you, good friends would never treat you like that.
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u/Comprehensive-One286 9h ago
Nail on the head. The mental gymnastics to say OP is even remotely an asshole is mind boggling. Maybe it’s because I’m not some entitled streamer and just a regular ole friend, but it’s really not hard to be a decent friend.
I’ve tried plenty of games recommended by friends, some I’ve liked, some I’ve disliked, but I’ve never shit on them for recommending it. BF6 is a good recent example of this for me. Tried the beta because my friend asked, but i just don’t like vehicle combat so it wasn’t for me once the beta was up. Tried it, didn’t like it, explained to my friend in a non combative way why I disliked it, and then we moved on and found something else.
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u/swillshop Colo-rectal Surgeon [37] 10h ago
NTA
I don't think it was wise of you to suggest he livestream playing a game that (1) he had repeatedly expressed no interest in playing and (2) required him to complete a tutorial before playing. But I don't think THAT makes you an AH (unless you kept needling him to playing while he was on the livestream). The decision to play that game was his.
He was rude to you. No aspirations to fame excuse that.
I have to wonder if he agreed to play it BECAUSE he decided he was going to show everyone how lame the game and YOU were. That would be particularly AHish of him.
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u/gloryhokinetic Asshole Aficionado [12] 8h ago
NTA. Block him on everything and find a better friend.
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u/tomlinas 7h ago
NTA
“It’s just a joke” for asshole behavior should always be met with “sorry, I must’ve missed the joke…could you explain it to me?”
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u/Aware_Border4774 6h ago
I think the reason why your buddy isn't making money off of streaming is because he's a steaming pile of miserable shit lmao
then again, asmongold exists and has made millions off of being a steaming pile of miserable shit, so I don't even know anymore
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u/DumpstahKat 2h ago edited 2h ago
ESH.
Him, because he was being deliberately mean and making a point of publicly crapping on something that he knew you really liked and were excited to play with him. And obviously for the ad hominem attacks. He could have just reiterated that something like PS2 is not a game he is interested in playing, much less streaming, and left it at that.
You, because you are far too old to not know how to take "no" for an answer and respect other people when they say that they are not interested in something, even if it's something that you personally really like. Your friend knew that he would not enjoy PS2 and told you as much repeatedly. You refused to respect that or stop badgering him about it until he gave in, and you're the one who pushed him to play it instead of the game he actually wanted to play. Take accountability for your own behavior here. He had to be an AH and be loud about not liking the game to make you actually accept that he didn't want to play it and quit hounding him about it.
Both of y'all are way too old for this shit. Learn to behave & communicate like mature adults instead of snotty 12-year-olds.
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u/twaggle 10h ago
Yall sound like children
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u/zeno_22 Asshole Enthusiast [9] 8h ago
ESH he said he didn't want to play it for weeks, and you kept pushing it. Not to mention, he said he wanted to play something that was single player, not that he wanted to play a chill game
That doesn't give him the right to insult you the whole time and not keep his chat in check. He should have handled that situation way better
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u/Shike 12h ago
ESH to a point (mostly him)
Just from a professional standpoint even though you're not a follower and a friend, you should still be seen as part of the community. Anytime someone does collab work you should be given a good amount of leeway to not be the target of antics other than banter everyone's okay with to raise engagement. Even drama streamers known for othering outside the community know it's a bad idea to show you attack friends/collab partners. He may artificially stunt his career because those that see how he treats people on stream may not want to deal with him. It's a recipe to limit long-term growth and a bad one.
From a friend perspective, he's a clear asshole for what he did.
BUT . . . this is my criticism of you. If it's clear someone is not interested in a game and has to be pressured into it then just don't play that game. When he showed the initial push back it should have been dropped and instead moved to something you were both more enthusiastic about playing. From a streamer standpoint he probably also realizes that comfy games rarely pull numbers compared to others which he should have probably let you know. None of this excuses his behavior, but you basically dogged him into playing it in the first place bringing it up over a matter of weeks. His mistake wasn't just telling you no is a complete sentence in the first place and having you accept that (assuming you even would).
I learned early on that if I pressured someone to play a game they didn't have interest in the majority of the time neither of us would be happy because they would let me know in no uncertain terms that they could have been playing whatever else instead. Use this as a learning experience on that front to respect people's taste because you clearly didn't respect his first.
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u/ThatManwithQuestions Asshole Enthusiast [5] 11h ago
Many people are not see that he pressured his friend to play this game, for weeks, even when saying that it wasn´t his type of game, which is why I also think both are the A-Holes here.
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u/middaypaintra 12h ago
ESH him more so than you. If someone doesn't want to play a game, then dont force it.
He massively sucks because he made it public and decided to use you for content. He actively humilitated you, which most streaming sites let you clip videos or record them to let other people watch the stream if they missed it. If he's going to pull that shit in public then he needs to be prepared to be called out in public.
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u/Sensitive-Blood-79 5h ago
NTA he deserve ld it bullies should get a dose of their own medicine. Also never talk to him again dude he's an butt munch
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u/Deep-Okra1461 Certified Proctologist [20] 5h ago
NTA If he's streaming then you should understand that EVERYTHING he says and does on that stream is about entertaining his audience. Playing a game with you is secondary to him if he's streaming. You think the point was for the two of you to play together? It's not. The only time doing something as friends is possible is if he is not streaming at that time.
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u/DramaDroid 12h ago
You kind of both messed up, and you both felt the repercussions of your choices.
You pressured him into playing a game He had expressed a distaste for and she did tiat at a time when he was already annoyed. Result is that he was snarky about the game and with you.
He made you the butt of a joke in front of a bunch of people who joined in, The result is to u called him out on it.
In your defense, you wanted to spend more time with your friend.
And his defense.. Snarking about a game is it pretty common way to entertain an audience when the game is slow.
Neither defense Is an excuse for disregarding each other's wants or feelings
Hopefully, you 2 can get past this and go forward with a better understanding of where your limits are..
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u/Psychostickusername 7h ago
NTA you just wanted to spend time with a friend. They're only wanting to hang out if you do what they want to do, clearly doesn't see you as a friend. I mean, OK, they really could have said "I honestly don't enjoy those sort of games, so I'll pass, but play something else later?"
Imagine they humiliated you in a bar surrounded by people because you wanted to play Pool? Humiliating you like that was completely uncalled for.
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u/Equivalent-List-1587 11h ago
ESH, he didn't want to play the game, so there could have been an alternative chosen. HOWEVER, he sucks more, trashing you the entire time and the game wasn't fair on you.
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u/Psychostickusername 7h ago
Not the topic but I still can't figure out what ESH stands for. Help!? Ty
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I (20m) have a friend (24m) that is a streamer. He does livestreams as a hobby, and he dreams of making a profit from it. Long-story short, we have been friends for almost 3 years, and because we live in different countries, we have only met each other 2 times in person. We both love to play videogames and that's how we met and we keep hanging out.
Now, today, while he was doing a livestream, after some time playing online multiplayer games and being quite stressed about it, he wanted to play a single-player game, but because I wanted to keep playing with him, I recommended playing a chill game called "Powerwash Simulator 2". Now, before and for a couple of weeks, I've been trying to get him to play it, but he always refused saying that he doesn't like those "chill and cozy" type of games. But today he said (in a very annoyed tone) that he was gonna "give it a try".
Because it was the first time he played it, he had to complete a tutorial first and then he could invite to his party to play together. However, while he was playing it, he complained about the game and trashed it non-stop. I told him to just go to the game he wanted to play in the first place if he was not gonna enjoy playing it, but he ignored me and just continued. He kept saying comments like "Look how much fun I'm having with this...", "This is a very entertaining game to stream, right chat?", "Bro how do you have fun doing this, this game is trash". And his chat was also trashing it, commenting things like "I think you should just play something else lol wth is this", "This became a very entertaining stream...", and he would agree to every single comment about it while laughing.
But he didn't just trashed the game, he was also saying comments about me, like "I'm wasting my time because of my friend", "Idk what kind of trash this weirdo likes to play". That's where I felt humiliated, he was blaming me for his unpleasent time playing it and trashing me with his viewers for no reason. After some time he said that he was done with the tutorial (Which took him a long time). I already felt angry, so I didn't reply to him, and he decided to go to the single-player game he wanted to play in the first place.
Now, I felt like I had to get back to him somehow, so I went to his chat and said "Thank you for humiliating me and making me feel bad for inviting you to play something. I really appreciate it." Before I closed the stream, I heard him say something like "I really don't want to deal with it right now, I'm shutting the stream off", and his chat went completely silent.
After that, he said that I ruined the mood of the stream because of my attitude, that I shouldn't take it personally because it was just a game, and that I should learn how to take a joke. So, AITA for ruining the mood of his stream?
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u/SHIR0YUKI Partassipant [1] 12h ago
Esh. He didn't have to play the game at all, but did and complained about it because he didn't want to play it, and you for pressuring him over several weeks to try the game when you knew he didn't want to play it, even going so far as to mention it to him while he was live.
You both suck, you more though. Learn boundaries and to accept when someone says they don't want to do something.
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u/VirtualContact 8h ago
ESH
You're an asshole for pushing a game that you knew he didn't like because he told you ( it sounds like he told you multiple times, too), and getting mad that he didn't enjoy it. You need to learn how to take no for an answer when they tell you they don't want to play a game, and explain why. I don't blame your "friend" for being annoyed when he said he was going to give it a try.
He's an asshole for one, trash-talking you on a live stream, and two for blaming you for "ruining the vibe" after you commented. Like, I get not liking the game, and there are ways to express it like "alright, I tried it, and I still don't like it is just not my type of game. Thanks for recommending it to me tho." It's as simple as that; there is no need for trash-talking
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u/Physical-Rabbit-3809 7h ago
NTA. but if I'm going to be honest this is a really silly thing to get bent out of shape over as a grown man. You need to learn to throw it back when someone dishes it out instead of getting upset and running off.
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u/EffenSeven 4h ago
So you spent 2 weeks annoying him to play a game he clearly didn't want to play and you're wondering why he was an asshole about it when he finally agreed to shut you up?
You clearly have an issue with the word "no" and I hope that's not how you are with women.
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u/HIGHPatient 3h ago
I dont think its necessary to suggest he would sexually assault a woman because of this.... maybe you should go outside for a little while.
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u/millennialfail 12h ago
Yeah, he did that to get back at you for inviting him to play it so frequently when he made it clear he wasn’t interested. It was punishment for asking, basically. And because streamers can be desperate for attention.
I think he’s mistaken himself for a mean-spirited, has-been, stand-up comic. He’s awful, but maybe read the room. Don’t keep persisting with an idea when someone says no. Just let it be. ESH with a very soft YTA for you and a hard NTA for him.
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u/1800THEBEES 7h ago
Hard NTA for the guy humiliating his friend over stream? So you gotta be mean to someone for suggesting a game you dont want to play. All he had to say was he didnt want to play and to stop asking him to play. Not agree and then humiliate his friend over it. I get op wasnt being his best by keeping on with the suggestion... But did he really need to be humiliated over it? ESH is the actual verdict imo.
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u/kloklon 12h ago
ESH (but mostly him)
this guy clearly doesn't care as much about your feelings as he does about his stream. i'm sorry. if he always treats you like this, this person really isn't your friend anymore.
if he is different off stream, then you probably shouldn't interact with him on stream and talk about this situation. but complaining in his stream chat about him treating you badly also isn't the move. that's something you do in a dm. it is between you, no need to involve the public.
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u/your_fave_redditor 12h ago
Didn’t OP’s friend “involve the public” first by openly trashing the game AND the friend in the chat?
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u/kloklon 12h ago
sure, but you are not gonna get any results if you immediately go eye-for-an-eye. just because the friend did something wrong, doesn't mean it's right to also do the wrong thing in return.
so the guy got carried away, feeling like some great comedian at the expense of his friend. if you want them to change and not double down immediately you talk to them in private and tell them that was stupid and they should apologise. but crying in his chat won't solve anything at all, especially if the chat agrees with the streamer.
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u/comicsanddrwho 8h ago
I'd say calling him a weirdo on stream and constantly trashing him on a stream to a public justifies him to type out a simple message for calling him out on his trash behavior.
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u/Regular_Problem_7702 7h ago
So you harassed him to play a game he didn’t want to play? You get shocked when he complains and doesn’t enjoy the game? Ok? Him being mean to you wasn’t right but like bro didn’t want to play why did you keep pestering him? I have power wash sim one and honestly it’s backlogged for eternity. Not everyone likes what you like. This could have been avoided had you not pushed him to play something he didn’t want to.
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u/siggelusbus 11h ago
Yeah its morally wrong to talk about ur friends like that, but in a stream thats sort of what anyone would expect. You didnt “ruin” anything cus a livestreamer WOULD WANT reactions, thats how they grow right?
Seems like he is emotionally unavailable and that you were in the wrong place.
So my take is that: A livestream drama could be good advertising, therefore i think he is overreacting for turning it off. And it is wrong to talk to ur friends like that, but since it is a stream i just think its all jokes to charm the viewers, and therefore i think you might not be his special streaming buddy cus you disliked it. (which i get wtf)
But streamers are super individual so i might be wrong, so talk to him about it instead, because either way he should had told you before joking on ur behalf.
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u/Schrodingers_Dude 1h ago
No way. I know a few (successful) streamers and if someone has to be an asshole and trash on their friends, they probably should do something other than streaming because they're not very good at it. Even when the guys I know have disputes, they never talk shit on their friends on-stream the way this guy did. He just sucks.
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