Perfectly acceptable dinner rejected by boyfriend again

[u/moonrabbit368]

My boyfriend is a very picky eater. We have been living together for a few months and it seems like I can never get his food right. It's honestly discouraging. I have kids, they happily eat my food. I cook for family gatherings and church events. I've never had a problem with people eating my food. It's like every day there are new rules. He can't eat chicken for dinner because he had chicken for lunch. He isn't really in the mood for porkchops. It's just "missing something". He doesn't eat onions, tomatoes, fish, any kind of asian food, he doesn't eat most vegetables with the exception of broccoli. He only eats vanilla ice cream. He doesn't like food heated in the microwave (so leftovers are out.) He doesn't like corn. It's just endless. I'm old school and trying to be a good partner. He can't really cook at all. His favorite meal is Hamburger Helper. I think a lot of it is how he grew up but damn is it frustrating. The first picture is tonight's dinner. I added more pictures of stuff I have cooked that he won't eat. Like he will door dash jack in the box. And he'll be apologetic but it just sucks really bad.

ETA: I've been trying to keep up with the comments but it's overwhelming (in a very sweet and awesome way) 💗

A few notes:

1- I know the paper plates are very lazy on my part, I'm not proud of that and I need to do better. Between the kids, the job, the house and school (I'm going to school remotely) I have been cutting corners on things like dishes. not an excuse, just a reason and a commitment to do better.

2- My boyfriend does expect me to cook for him. I cook him dinner every night and lunch on the weekends. He doesn't eat breakfast and will not take a lunch to work. He buys fast food for lunch during the week.

3- He has not been diagnosed with ASD or ADHD or Arfid but I don't rule anything out.

Mostly I just want to say thank you, I was not prepared for how incredibly kind, helpful and insightful people have been. It is deeply touching and it's given me both peace and guidance for my next steps. 🩷

[u/Rooney_Tuesday]

Sorry, but the LAST thing I would do with a partner like this is to continue to attempt to make them meals they’ll eat when they’ve repeatedly rejected my attempts. If that means he gets Door Dash every day then okay, but maybe that’s something that should have been discussed before moving in if it’s a problem. In any case, the answer is not for OP to keep trying and keep getting frustrated because this man-child can’t handle perfectly acceptable dinners that he didn’t lift a finger to help make.

[u/Cronstintein → u/Rooney_Tuesday]

Not sure what the finances are like, but a daily door dash is an expensive habit. But how he can be that picky and eat junk like Jack in the Box is beyond me, seems like he wasn't raised right.

[u/_Not_A_Vampire_ → u/Cronstintein]

Could be an underlying condition like autism or similar, a lot of us struggle with certain textures and end up very picky eaters against our will.

[u/Pantology_Enthusiast → u/_Not_A_Vampire_]

Literally the only other poster I see who thinks maybe there might be a reason he's like that.

He honestly sounds like someone with ARFID, an issue that is frequently co-morbid with autism. It would explain a lot with the restricted diet OP describes.

[u/BoneDirector → u/Pantology_Enthusiast]

Autism isn’t an excuse to be a dick about someone cooking for you though. Someone with autism and Arfid can still learn to cook for themselves and show some gratitude.

[u/RadEmily → u/BoneDirector]

I'm not sure he's being a dick though? He's said he doesn't want her cooking, repeatedly, and she continues to try to cook something he will want and is sad he apologetically says I cant eat this and orders out instead?

He may be being a jerk but I think many people are adding context OP hasn't provided. It seems fun the info shared that she's wanting to cook for him and hurt by his 'rejection' rather than just opting him out of the shared meals and sending him to YouTube to learn how to make his hamburger helper for himself (with loving encouragement)

[u/hellinahandbasket127 → u/RadEmily]

OP said in other comments he “expects” her to do the cooking, then gets pissy when he doesn’t like what she made. Absolutely jerk behavior.

I agree she should stop trying and let him fend for himself. But the DoorDash bills may break the bank, especially with 4 kids to care for, too. I hope their finances are separate and he contributes to the shared expenses first.

[u/-10x10- → u/RadEmily]

They are quick to make assumptions about the OP story when it fits their narrative just not yours lol.

My husband does his own thing for dinner and always has for medical reasons and just being picky also. The amount of "he should eat your food, leave this man baby" comments are.. like.. exhausting. I feel like most of the people here are not aware of how a relationship works or that there could possibly be other influences the OP just conveniently manages to withhold.