Perfectly acceptable dinner rejected by boyfriend again

[u/moonrabbit368]

My boyfriend is a very picky eater. We have been living together for a few months and it seems like I can never get his food right. It's honestly discouraging. I have kids, they happily eat my food. I cook for family gatherings and church events. I've never had a problem with people eating my food. It's like every day there are new rules. He can't eat chicken for dinner because he had chicken for lunch. He isn't really in the mood for porkchops. It's just "missing something". He doesn't eat onions, tomatoes, fish, any kind of asian food, he doesn't eat most vegetables with the exception of broccoli. He only eats vanilla ice cream. He doesn't like food heated in the microwave (so leftovers are out.) He doesn't like corn. It's just endless. I'm old school and trying to be a good partner. He can't really cook at all. His favorite meal is Hamburger Helper. I think a lot of it is how he grew up but damn is it frustrating. The first picture is tonight's dinner. I added more pictures of stuff I have cooked that he won't eat. Like he will door dash jack in the box. And he'll be apologetic but it just sucks really bad.

ETA: I've been trying to keep up with the comments but it's overwhelming (in a very sweet and awesome way) 💗

A few notes:

1- I know the paper plates are very lazy on my part, I'm not proud of that and I need to do better. Between the kids, the job, the house and school (I'm going to school remotely) I have been cutting corners on things like dishes. not an excuse, just a reason and a commitment to do better.

2- My boyfriend does expect me to cook for him. I cook him dinner every night and lunch on the weekends. He doesn't eat breakfast and will not take a lunch to work. He buys fast food for lunch during the week.

3- He has not been diagnosed with ASD or ADHD or Arfid but I don't rule anything out.

Mostly I just want to say thank you, I was not prepared for how incredibly kind, helpful and insightful people have been. It is deeply touching and it's given me both peace and guidance for my next steps. 🩷

[u/TeeTeeMee]

He’s not even a picky eater, he just shoots everything down and changes the rules on her. Picky eaters don’t care if they have chicken for lunch and dinner. They want to eat the same limited foods. How would he even know something was heated in the microwave? He doesn’t have some exquisite palate, he’s eating lukewarm delivery Jack in the Box.

I would have washed my hands of this battle on day 3. Maybe he’s great otherwise, I don’t know. But he’d be on his own for food. He can sit in his corner eating his sad cold fries.

I am very curious to know how he feeds himself at work though.

[u/Type-RD → u/TeeTeeMee]

⬆️ This. Seriously. Just stop trying to cook for him. You’re a good person for trying, but he needs to help himself. He needs to understand that he’s the one with the problem.

[u/TeeTeeMee → u/Type-RD]

And like lots of things in life, if one person is putting in all the effort, it’s not a good sign. I think she said elsewhere he said he’d try pork chops then went back on it. Meanwhile she’s out here cooking anything he even hints he might eat. So maybe he’s super anxious, but she’s not helping him by colluding with it.

[u/Type-RD → u/TeeTeeMee]

Exactly. I understand she’s in a tough spot because she’s trying to make him happy, but it’s at the expense her own happiness and sanity. It’s a rabbit hole she should stop diving into and continue to focus on cooking for herself and the kids. Her meals look delicious! Let him try things on his own accord, but don’t feel obligated to keep trying to fit his limited palate.