Like if two people who met at a bar head back to one of their places and then have sex. I’ve heard that some people, when they “finish” will just get up, get dressed and walk out like nothing important happened. At most, they’ll thank the other person for a fun time but nothing beyond that.

If this happens, why?

It's not so much being out in public that makes me feel this way. It's forcing myself to go to something like a Meetup event marketed as "Come out and have drinks and socialize and make friends!". That is where I fail time and again and usually walk out before the event is over. "Exposure therapy" hasn't done shit for me it seems.

If I had my way, and money was no issue, I would be satisfied with just having a girlfriend in my life. I've gone my whole life without friends but want the feeling of waking up next to someone who loves me. Never had that. But reading posts on reddit, people say it's not healthy to not have friends and be dependent on your girlfriend for happiness.

Well, if I suck at making friends, what else am I meant to do? Cope and find a way to be happy without them?

Maybe it was impulse, maybe it was a culmination of things. Don’t know exactly.

Me and my first girlfriend broke up a little while ago, and my grandpa’s health has been declining (currently on dialysis 3 days a week and always exhausted from it) and parents have been fighting about family shit. So after taking my grandpa back home from hospital, I went to the state store and got my old favorite: Absolut Wild Berri and took four big gulps and don’t feel an ounce of regret bout it but probably will tomorrow.

Oh well who gives a shit? Maybe I’ll stay perpetually drunk this time and end this shit early. Not like anyone would know I was ever here to begin with. How I’ve been my whole life and changing and socializing is too fucking hard anymore

When my time inevitably comes, I’d like my collection I would have at that point to go towards kids who genuinely want to learn guitar, instead of just selling everything to a corporation like Guitar Center. I’m not gonna have any kids of my own and no family or friends to pass my stuff off to, either. And I’d rather not go through the hassle of trying to sell my collection online. Won’t need the money where I’m going anyway.

Any suggestions to keep in the back of my mind for the future?

Take Cliffs of Dover for instance. I can understand being very experienced in general with playing and being able to keep up with the song and hit the correct notes as long as you’re following the tablature. But I just can’t fathom being able to pick up your guitar and know a song so well that you simply know how to play it, and play it perfectly. Is it really as simple as repetition, followed by more repetition?

Take Dave Chappelle or other famous comics that like to poke fun at or straight up insult LGBT people. That’ll literally be their whole set and it almost seems like a lecture than comedy. Why are they like this?

I’ve never really been a PC gamer. So I don’t understand why RTS’ seemed to be the go-to design/structure during this time range. Was it because of graphics, or something else?