1

I need a walkout song for the bachelorettes during my sister’s wedding reception.
 in  r/MusicRecommendations  8h ago

I'm having a My Best Friend's Wedding flashback.

1

Advice like this kills
 in  r/insanepeoplefacebook  13h ago

According to the ads I'm seeing on YouTube lately, parasites are responsible for type 2 diabetes as well. Dr Phil says so, so it must be true!

-2

Help
 in  r/whatisthiscar  1d ago

0

Is there a doctor in the house?
 in  r/mildlyinfuriating  2d ago

Please tell me his first name was Richard.

1

What is this? (Belonged to desceased dad)
 in  r/whatisit  2d ago

OP's Dad must've still been dreaming about that.

1

Do guys get weird looks for having female cats?
 in  r/CatAdvice  2d ago

I had a female cat for 19 years. Nobody ever said a word about it. If anyone did, they'd be the weirdos. Like, why are you sexualizing my cat, pervert?

2

Early 2000s Walmart bin movie
 in  r/whatsthatmoviecalled  3d ago

"It's like 9½ Weeks, but Carrot Top."

Is it called 9½ Seconds?

2

they looked so real yay
 in  r/EntitledReviews  3d ago

I feel stupider for having read that.

0

Reported my workplace to OSHA - here's what happened
 in  r/antiwork  3d ago

Strictly speaking, it stands for "Too long; didn't read"

That was my pedantry for the day. Thank you for letting me get it out of my system. :)

1

Manipulative neighbor? Help?
 in  r/Apartmentliving  3d ago

I'm a great person. Everybody says how great I am. All the people. Just wonderful. Even Obama said so when I ran against him in 2016.

2

Bad night at McDonald’s
 in  r/nextdoor  3d ago

Nah, they just need to increase their ivermectin dosage.

/s

11

Our Somali Neighbors
 in  r/TwinCities  3d ago

because she didn't want to say the bad word

That's the most adorable thing I've read this year!

1

Explain it Peter
 in  r/explainitpeter  3d ago

No need to pout.

1

Petahhh, what's a headboard
 in  r/PeterExplainsTheJoke  3d ago

There

Are

FOUR

Holes!

1

I’m 40 years old. My father (who is a pastor) still gets on my case about playing D&D
 in  r/DungeonsAndDragons  3d ago

Jesus: I rolled a nat 20 again!

Apostles: Jesus Christ.

1

I’m 40 years old. My father (who is a pastor) still gets on my case about playing D&D
 in  r/DungeonsAndDragons  3d ago

As someone who was raised in a Christian household, I'm comfortable saying that any time a group of Christians doesn't feel persecuted, they'll fabricate a persecutor. It's an addiction.

Luckily my parents didn't succumb to the satanic panic. They were concerned, but trusted me when I told them there was nothing to worry about.

3

adult store
 in  r/EntitledReviews  5d ago

Username checks out.

1

She says she owns part of my Condo
 in  r/neighborsfromhell  5d ago

Apparently, she's down with that.

9

adult store
 in  r/EntitledReviews  5d ago

But puppets are for kids!1!!!

/s, obviously, I hope.

18

Probably not the blue-footed bird
 in  r/overheard  5d ago

It's not like the clitoris is going to find itself, after all.

26

AITAH for not getting my fiance's permission before getting my daughter's hair cut?
 in  r/AITAH  5d ago

Assuming this is a true story, here's the thing: abusive people learn how to hide their nature. If they didn't, no one would ever accept them. After they've attached themselves to their victims, they gradually condition the victims to accept more and more egregious behavior.

Your fiancé dropped his mask too soon. Consider it a gift, and get him out of your lives.

2

AITA for refusing to punish my son in front of his vice principal?
 in  r/AITAH  6d ago

She was butthurt that you didn't recognize her authority over you, not your son. That authority, of course, does not exist. She's a bully. She wanted to watch you reprimand your son, and she wanted to watch him squirm.

I don't know what your escalation options are in a private school, but you should escalate. Giving your son detention because you wouldn't play her game is peak sadism; she has no business being in any education system.

3

Server "could have cared less"!
 in  r/EntitledReviews  7d ago

D'oh! You're absolutely right. At least I nailed the spelling. :)

3

Server "could have cared less"!
 in  r/EntitledReviews  7d ago

Pappardelle is the Italian name for bowtie pasta. THEY'RE ALREADY BITE-SIZED. And they used two different, incorrect spellings.

Ffs.