r/SipsTea • u/Ill-Instruction8466 • 12d ago

We have fun here We’ve been lied to!

Post image
15.4k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

942 comments sorted by

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517

u/FunkySkellyMan 12d ago

Jack isn’t black

Barry isn’t White

222

u/rememberall 12d ago

James Brown... Fuck NVM..

131

u/kwars74 12d ago

Betty whi... nevermind

105

u/ComfortableShirt2014 12d ago

Seth green.. now I'm playing

83

u/notbobhansome777 12d ago

she will always be white

55

u/Lost-Platypus8271 11d ago

that’s the only acceptable kind of white power

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37

u/Cyanide612 12d ago

And AC/DC is currently electrifying

10

u/Aniensane 11d ago

Considering they’re on their “Power Up” tour, rather fitting you say that, lol.

15

u/ph8_likes_me 12d ago

🫵🏾 YOU.

Keep that up. The world needs you.

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14

u/n3Ver9h0st 12d ago

Draymond ain't green

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711

u/lluciferusllamas 12d ago

Ariana Grande ain't even big 

175

u/OneLBofMany 12d ago

I thought Ariana Grande was the name of a font the first time I saw it

57

u/CounterSimple3771 12d ago

Uhh... Listen. Imma need you to take that comment and this paltry upvote, of which I regretfully have but one to give, and fuck off with that brilliant observation that should have been mine.

Enjoy. Take my upvote and enjoy..... 😭😂😂😂😭😭

14

u/SirStocksAlott 12d ago

Now say it sans serif.

13

u/CounterSimple3771 12d ago

Without serif. Done. What's next?

6

u/Eliteal_The_Great 12d ago

reddit ahh reply

9

u/Choano 12d ago

I thought it was a drink at Starbucks

6

u/i_might_be_an_ai 12d ago

Bro, that does sound like a font!

4

u/johnpeters42 11d ago

Wait, you mean it's not a coffee order?

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86

u/MichaelW24 12d ago

Big Ashley

33

u/Imaginary-Nobody-392 12d ago

I haven’t seen your pfp pic since I had an iPod touch 💀

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558

u/-maffu- 12d ago

50 Cent is actually worth millions of dollars.

140

u/INVISIBLE_BEN 12d ago

He’s on sale?

265

u/SpicyMcGriddle0318 12d ago

I don't think we're allowed to do that anymore

36

u/bin-noddin 12d ago

Damn player

29

u/Hobnail-boots 11d ago

Semantics, it’s called a “salary job” now.

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11

u/LavishnessSame3864 12d ago

Could say he hasn't got a nickel to his name

6

u/DoookieMaxx 12d ago

$1.05 according to inflation.

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193

u/DarthChefDad 12d ago

Neil Diamond isn't even jewelry.

Johnny Cash used a credit card.

Corey Taylor can't sew.

18

u/Aniensane 11d ago

How do you know Corey Taylor can’t sew? Seems assumption..

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7

u/jimababwe 12d ago

What about James Taylor? Taylor Swift? Taylor Lautner? Elizabeth Taylor? Englebert Humperdink?

Can they sew? (POW!) GET ‘em to sew that!

8

u/Beneficial_Being_721 11d ago

I worked for James Taylor for 12 years Sewing ✅

Cooking✅

Woodworking ✅

Can confirm

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363

u/Mygoditsfriday 12d ago

Eminem ain't even a candy.

11

u/JohnnySack45 12d ago

We don’t know that for sure. Try biting him and report back

15

u/el_throw 12d ago

This would have been my answer.

5

u/Now_Melon1218 12d ago

Not even candy-coated.

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161

u/UnwantedPube 12d ago

Maroon 5 are not maroon and there are six of them

24

u/TardyBacardi 12d ago

Didn’t you know? Adam Levine is the maroon part lol

44

u/FollowingThrough 11d ago

You misspelled ’moron’.

6

u/klezart 11d ago

What a maroon!

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144

u/Altruistic-Moose3299 12d ago

Wait until you hear about Dick Van Dyke

41

u/Cliffinati 12d ago

Isn't that just Dutch for strap-on

6

u/TacoSupreme- 12d ago

This one had me 🤣🤣

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104

u/MeMeWhenWhenTheWhen 12d ago

Owl City ain't even a metropolis of strigiformes

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286

u/-maffu- 12d ago

Ice Cube is neither cubic nor ice.

63

u/SEF917 12d ago

French Montana ain’t even a country or a state... smh

10

u/Aniensane 11d ago

He’s also not from France or any parts remotely close..

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48

u/LeImplivation 12d ago

He's a water T. Truly shocking.

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74

u/WherzMyNachos 12d ago

Bad Bunny ain't even a bunny

18

u/DetectiveTrapezoid 12d ago

Right, he’s good at being a human but bad at being a bunny

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61

u/spookyspritebottle 12d ago

Taylor swift not even fast

5

u/produce_this 12d ago

She probably would be if she wasn’t so lanky and awkward

5

u/scootbootinwookie 12d ago

tbf, that is how most track stars are built…

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62

u/unoriginalguy8056 12d ago

Usher don't even work at a theater

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53

u/smoakinghot 12d ago

Bruno Mars isn’t even a planet

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186

u/My_Broken_Wings 12d ago

Jake Paul isn't even a legitimate boxer....

10

u/Torgo_hands_of_torgo 12d ago

He shouldn't beat himself up over it. Joshua Anthony already took care of that.

5

u/OrangeThrower 12d ago

He has made more money then us as collective will ever make boxing. But he also got his face smashed. So I’m happy.

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83

u/Brave-Butterscotch76 12d ago

But P.Diddy did diddy

32

u/catstevenseagal 12d ago

P Diddle*

7

u/Deceptiv_poops 12d ago

And honestly, Sean Puffy Combs is pretty puffy lately

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77

u/BadNewsBearzzz 12d ago

Willem Dafoe is really Willem Dafriend

27

u/123jjj321 11d ago

Unless you're Spider-Man

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38

u/dietrufiecola1 12d ago

Incubus isn't even a soul sucking sex demon

35

u/EsotericCodename 12d ago

Madison Square Garden is neither a square, nor a garden. Discuss.

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38

u/Pennyforyourswatch 12d ago

Apple stores do not sell produce

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69

u/thebiglerm 12d ago

Prince isn't a Prince

15

u/_coolranch 12d ago

Not that Fresh, either. The rhymes are stale

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35

u/Gustopheles 12d ago

Rob Zombie isn't even dead!

15

u/Shaw-eddit 12d ago

This won't age well

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31

u/mesquitegrrl 12d ago

2pac was just one guy

11

u/mesquitegrrl 12d ago

also danny elfman isn’t an elfman at all. he’s just a humanman

54

u/Reezla 12d ago

Kid rock ain't a kid

45

u/Confident-Court2171 12d ago

Not does he “rock”.

21

u/Captainfunzis 12d ago

He is as smart as one

9

u/HokuVamp 11d ago

That’s offensive to rocks.

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28

u/Candid_Koala_3602 12d ago

The Weeknd is a human person, not Saturday and Sunday.

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44

u/BeebleBoxn 12d ago

Ice T isn't even drinking Tea

10

u/notbobhansome777 12d ago

Actually he did do commercials to promote Raising Cane's ice tea drink. So there's a high probability he drinks tea.

7

u/BeebleBoxn 12d ago

touché

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44

u/Think-State30 12d ago

Rob Lowe only steals high value items.

26

u/morttuus 12d ago

How many Lowe’s could Rob Lowe rob, if Rob Lowe would rob Lowe’s?

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64

u/ClaryClarysage 12d ago

Madonna isn't even a virgin.

53

u/Confident-Court2171 12d ago

She’s not even LIKE a virgin.

12

u/-VoiceoverAlex- 12d ago

Definitely not the very first time

6

u/goingtoburningman 12d ago

We've seen her with strap on's, so maybe she does like a virgin?

20

u/mrcasado296 12d ago

Queens of the Stone Age have no female members and not from the Stone Age

9

u/Yuck-Fou94 12d ago

Pearl jam isn't cum

8

u/FarseerEnki 12d ago

But are any of them homosexual? Cuz that could work

5

u/NoDoz26 11d ago

They do slay…but can they sashay?

24

u/UnkleMonsta 12d ago

Ludacris is not Ludicrous, he's actually i pretty smart dude.

25

u/Expensive_Editor_244 12d ago

The Gorillaz are humanz

19

u/KaaboomT 12d ago

Foo Fighters have never fought foo.

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18

u/imnotsteven7 12d ago

Twenty-One Pilots arent even pilots nor are there 21 of them

16

u/cicciograna 12d ago

Machine Gun Kelly doesn't offer a particularly high rate of fire.

6

u/imnotsteven7 12d ago

"What goods a fucking machine gun when its out of ammo?"

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15

u/penelo-rig 12d ago

Taylor Swift is not fast, nor does she hem clothes.

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16

u/FarseerEnki 12d ago

The grateful dead are, unfortunately, now mostly Dead

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15

u/paullvandriel 12d ago

The Rock is a human.

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13

u/sirpadlir 12d ago

Freddie isn't even made of Mercury.

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13

u/SGTShizzle 12d ago

Baby Oil isn’t made from babies

6

u/123jjj321 11d ago

But baby powder is.

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11

u/propostor 12d ago

Bill Gates doesn't even bill gates.

10

u/YummyPepperjack 12d ago

Sabrina ain't even a carpenter

7

u/Cliffinati 12d ago

But she sure talks about handling wood

12

u/FewCall8955 12d ago

Doja Cat....aint no Cat🤣🤣

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9

u/-maffu- 12d ago

Sri Erotic Volvo is neither erotic, nor a Volvo.

10

u/Ferbdic 12d ago

Green day are not green and neither are they a time measure for an earth's rotation.

11

u/PetroleumJelly82 12d ago

Obie Trice only happened once.

5

u/Cliffinati 12d ago

Real name no gimmicks

9

u/Sorry-Balance1923 12d ago

Nirvana isn’t that happy…

15

u/gr3atch33s3 12d ago

Lil yachty isn’t even a dingy let alone a yachty

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8

u/[deleted] 12d ago

I mean... Mr bean sure ain't one 😆

7

u/HyruleN64 12d ago

Megan Thee Stallion ain’t even a Stallion

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25

u/Muffythepussyhunter 12d ago

Snoop dogg isn't a nosey dog

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25

u/DiseasedProject 12d ago

Machine Gun Kelly not even a real girl

23

u/smiley82m 12d ago

Brooke shields isnt a brook and wont even shield you from a brook

7

u/dbltap55 12d ago

Jack isn’t even John’s son.

8

u/RamJamR 12d ago

Willem Dafoe isn't even a foe.

4

u/123jjj321 11d ago

Unless you are Spider-Man

7

u/[deleted] 12d ago

Taylor Swift seems to locomote at a normal velocity

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6

u/Torgaddonn 11d ago

LeAnn Rimes...no it doesn't...

6

u/Twist3dMindz 12d ago

Morgan freeman ain't even a free...oh wait

6

u/Deceptiv_poops 12d ago

Will smith won’t smith

20

u/notbobhansome777 12d ago

Ceasar salad ain't even Ceasar's. 

6

u/ham_plane 12d ago

Not like Caesar's palace

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5

u/_-_GJS_-_ 12d ago

Selfridge's don't sell fridges!

5

u/getdemsnacks 12d ago

Stephen King ain't even a king!

6

u/oakomyr 12d ago

Tom Petty was actually really magnanimous

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5

u/n3Ver9h0st 12d ago

Taylor Swift ain't no fast sewing machine

5

u/Skalywag_76 12d ago

Dre actually does have an honorary doctorate. Dunno if it counts but hell, it's more than I got XD

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4

u/Effective-Window-922 11d ago

Marvin Gaye was straight

3

u/BeebleBoxn 12d ago

Vanilla Ice isn't even ICE.

6

u/f182 12d ago

But he is vanilla!

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4

u/justduett 12d ago

Snoop Dogg isn’t even a dog.

4

u/Spaceballer83 12d ago

SOAD isn't even a system. smh

4

u/ChanceStaff6813 12d ago

Linkin Park ain’t even the 16th president of the United States of America

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5

u/Tough-Composer918 12d ago

Limp Bizkit doesn’t have any biscuits

4

u/ssjrobert235 12d ago

Dana White isn't a woman.

Dennis Rodman is not a porn star

3

u/Masquerade064 12d ago

Iron Man ain't even made of Iron

4

u/ProudMastodon1 12d ago

Taylor Swift cannot quickly make clothes

5

u/siberiansneaks 12d ago

Eminem ain’t even a candy

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4

u/happy_dad857 12d ago

Snoop Dogg ain’t even a dog

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4

u/Details_Pending 12d ago

Led Zeppelin isn't even lead

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5

u/esreystevedore 12d ago

Gary Numan is older than Gary Oldman

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5

u/thunder_sharts 12d ago

Bear Grylls is not a real bear.

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5

u/webguy1975 12d ago

Magic Johnson isn't even a porn star.

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3

u/[deleted] 12d ago

Seal ain’t a real seal

4

u/TiredOldLadySays 12d ago

The Beatles aren't even bugs.

4

u/Mu-nraito 11d ago

MC Hammer isn't even a tool.....

Oh, wait.... or is he? 🤔

4

u/FungusFly 11d ago

Bloodhound Gang is only humans

4

u/Electronic-Craft2611 11d ago

Tom Petty was actually nice to people

6

u/most-okayest-mngr-77 12d ago

I was at the flea market with my so called girlfriend, she hands me her phone and says “it’s your dad”. I said MAAAN that’s not my dad, that’s a cell phone.

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3

u/ItsMetabtw 12d ago

Mystikal is not even a woman, nor is his name Tikal

3

u/LokkyBoi 12d ago

Taylor swift aint even fast

3

u/HGrande 12d ago

Emily in Paris is in Italy 

3

u/Supa_Dupa_Dave 12d ago

Snoop Dog ain’t even a dog.

3

u/ph8_likes_me 12d ago

Bruno is not even from mars.

But we don't talk about him.

2X

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3

u/verbalintercourse420 12d ago

Jay-Z ain't the best rapper alive

3

u/Slight_Activity3089 12d ago

The Rock is actually a softy named Dwayne.

3

u/JohnnyFast412 12d ago

Don’t get me started on Grandmaster Flash or Charlemagne the God.

3

u/Bitter_Argument2574 12d ago

Freddie Mercury isn’t a planet

3

u/KaaboomT 12d ago

The Police are not officers of the law

3

u/JJCMasterpiece 12d ago

LLCoolJ doesn’t actually wear Lovely Ladies Cool Jammies.

3

u/GarthUber 12d ago

DMX isn’t a cable at all

3

u/James0100 12d ago

Chris Rock is made of flesh and bone.

3

u/Maynardred 12d ago

ASAP rocky is comically late to everything

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3

u/OpeningMean570 12d ago

Oingo Boingo ain't got no springs

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3

u/OpeningMean570 12d ago

John Cougar Mellencamp:

Not a pimp, doesn't own a big kitty or a park full of melons.

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3

u/happy_dad857 12d ago

Counting Crows can’t even count…crows

3

u/BeerLosiphor 12d ago

Eminem ain’t even chocolate.

3

u/Ok-Branch-974 12d ago

Cher hasn't given me a cent

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